I have all of the bases covered that you don't:
I've never been part of the military (but I still support my troops -- just not like Keith P.)
I'm already involved in politics (experience is the key, here)
I don't work at night (we could be 24/7, man!)
I've never been covered in red paint by Gene Ha
I have hair (so we get the pro and anti follicle vote)
I've met some of the porn stars you've wanked to, AND I'm ruggedly handsome.
Also, I'd do what any good vice-Blandy does....all the work.
I should at least be liaison to Asian affairs, that's for sure.
Now that I think about it, I'd be a better campaign manager. I suggest you go with Jesus as a running mate for four reasons:
1. You'd get the Christian vote.
2. You'd get the hippie vote.
3. You could simply change bumper stickers that say "Jesus is my co-pilot" to "Jesus is my running mate" to save money.
4. Need wine? Just go get some water.