So, a Pimp called in at work today...

[Whip]

For training with the police department we had to sit with 911 dispatchers for a day. I couldn't believe all the weird people that call in. You ask them for basic information and they never give you exactly what you need. Always going off on some weird tangent that only slows the process down.

1000 times yes. OMG.

Caller: THIS GUY JUST SLAPPED ME.
Me: Is he white, black, Indian, Asian, or Hispanic?
Caller: Yes.
Me: (headdesk)


Caller: This car just hit me and took off towards Blah Blah Blah street.
Me: What color is the vehicle?
Caller: It's a Pick-Up truck!


Caller: My boyfriend is trashing the property.
Me: What color pants is he wearing?
Caller: Levi's.

[LordKinbote]

Caller: My boyfriend is trashing the property.
Me: What color pants is he wearing?
Caller: Levi's.

Well, there's the problem. Ask more relevant questions!

[The Cable Guy]

Do you ever get to the point where you think every one else in the world is an idiot but yourself?

[Whip]

Well, there's the problem. Ask more relevant questions!

It is relevant. We need as much of a description as possible for an in-progress crime.

[dmh3000]

I had a guy last week call to report a theft. Apparently, the guy he TWICE admitted that he bought $30 of crack cocaine from didn't give him the product he wanted. I had to advise him of Buyer Beware, while stalling until police got there. He wasn't arrested, though.

Another guy last week called and was freaking out, saying he first had needed medical aid because he didn't want to be a sex offender for having sex with a 17 year old girl. He was 43.

And I think my all-time favorite was the guy calling to ask if Crystal Meth was still illegal.

Man, your job sounds way more interesting than anything I've heard. Only calls I get at EB are mothers yelling because a Wii game won't play in their kid's Xbox.

[Whip]

Do you ever get to the point where you think every one else in the world is an idiot but yourself?

Everyday.

[danlomb]

I was hoping for Alabaster Jones.

Nice.

[Spank Everest]

I swear, some of this stuff sounds like somethin' outta 'It's Always Sunny in Philidelphia'.

[Jason Baur]

For training with the police department we had to sit with 911 dispatchers for a day. I couldn't believe all the weird people that call in. You ask them for basic information and they never give you exactly what you need. Always going off on some weird tangent that only slows the process down.

Imagine that. It's almost like they're panicking or something.

[Dave S.]

I am a lifeguard instructor and we have a whole unit we teach on how to call 911.