PDA

View Full Version : Last night...



LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 10:03 AM
Okay, so last night, I'm at a party or something, and I hook up with this chick. We start making out, soon she's naked, and I go down on her, and then she passes out and that's it... She's laying there passed out and naked and that's it.

So lame.

The Cheap-Arse Film Critic
10-23-2005, 10:04 AM
And yet, I'd give my right nut for that...

AAlgar
10-23-2005, 10:04 AM
Score?

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 10:05 AM
Score?
No. She passed out and I just huddled up and cried.

amy
10-23-2005, 10:05 AM
Score?


-3.

Shane W
10-23-2005, 10:05 AM
She was there at the bar, she heard my guitar
She was long and tall, she was the queen of them all
Last night, thinking about last night
Last night, thinking about last night

She was dark and discreet, she was light on her feet
We went up to her room and she lowered the boom
Last night, thinking about last night
Last night, thinking about last night


Down below they danced and sang in the street
While up above the walls were steaming with heat
Last night, thinking about last night
Last night, thinking about last night

I was feeling no pain, feeling good in my brain
I looked in her eyes, they were full of surprise
Last night, talking about last night
Last night, talking about last night


I asked her to marry me she smiled and pulled out a knife
The partyís just beginning she said, itís your money or you life
Last night, talking about last night
Last night, talking about last night

Now Iím back at the bar, she went a little too far
She done me wrong, all I got is this song
Last night, thinking about last night
Last night, thinking about last night

Olivier E.
10-23-2005, 10:05 AM
:(

what a cow

AAlgar
10-23-2005, 10:07 AM
-3.

:rofl:

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 10:07 AM
:(

what a cow
I know... It's a damn shame, because everybody in my area code knows I'm the mu'fuckin' Cunnilingus King! :no:

Shane W
10-23-2005, 10:08 AM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.

Agent Desmond
10-23-2005, 10:10 AM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.

:lol:

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 10:11 AM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.

I can't believe how much I fucking hate you.

I mean it. I hate you more than I hate (George) Bush.

;)


I know... It's a damn shame, because everybody in my area code knows I'm the mu'fuckin' Cunnilingus King! :no:

Agent Desmond
10-23-2005, 10:17 AM
You hate bush? No wonder she fell asleep, you're heart wasn't in it

Ben
10-23-2005, 10:18 AM
You should've left her a present.

Shane W
10-23-2005, 10:25 AM
And what the hell are your doing going down on a random drunk party chick? Who knows what kind of crotch-crickets and whatnot are down there.

Ryan Elliott
10-23-2005, 10:29 AM
And what the hell are your doing going down on a random drunk party chick? Who knows what kind of crotch-crickets and whatnot are down there.



....


Ewwwwwww...


Dude, you should have just went down anyway and maybe she would have woke up. Or...tried something different.


I'm sorry to everyone I offended. :Oops:

Patton
10-23-2005, 10:34 AM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.
Dude, I can totally believe that.

Evan the Shaggy
10-23-2005, 10:39 AM
And yet, I'd give my right nut for that...

Trust me, you wouldn't. Its really frustrating.

Mr. E!
10-23-2005, 11:06 AM
Okay, so last night, I'm at a party or something, and I hook up with this chick. We start making out, soon she's naked, and I go down on her, and then she passes out and that's it... She's laying there passed out and naked and that's it.

So lame.


At least she didn't pass out and loose bowel control while you were down there. But seriously, hooking up with a girl who is so drunk that she passes out during oral is never a good idea. Was she in her right mind, or just really sleepy?

Ryan Elliott
10-23-2005, 11:08 AM
At least she didn't pass out and loose bowel control while you were down there. But seriously, hooking up with a girl who is so drunk that she passes out during oral is never a good idea. Was she in her right mind, or just really sleepy?


If you were a girl, and you were in your right mind, would you let Len go down on YOU?



:twisted:

Mr. E!
10-23-2005, 11:10 AM
If you were a girl, and you were in your right mind, would you let Len go down on YOU?



:twisted:

Well, if he shaved his stubble off, sure. I'm pretty sure that if I was a girl, I'd have had worse than Len between my thighs by now...

Ryan Elliott
10-23-2005, 11:12 AM
Well, if he shaved his stubble off, sure. I'm pretty sure that if I was a girl, I'd have had worse than Len between my thighs by now...



GAH!!

andrew french
10-23-2005, 11:13 AM
last night, some drunk guys on my floor came running through my hallway, yelling, at 2 am. One jump kicked my door, and they proceeded to ravage to the bathroom while screaming/pissing in unison.

i stepped out in my underwear in a T shirt, into the bathroom and yelled "Shut up" at the top of my lungs.

they didn't get it so i put on pants, waited for them to walk past my door, when i said "seriously, shut up. just SHUT. UP."
they were all either laughing or saying that it wasn't quiet hours, so i just looked each one in the face as he walked by and told him, personally, to shut up.

COTE
10-23-2005, 12:21 PM
i'm calling several different kinds of bullshit
why would you post this if it actually happened

but even if it did, you "mad" skills didn't seem to help the drunk girl you "hooked" up with.

love comes and goes but herpes will last forever

think about that

kaptain
10-23-2005, 12:22 PM
I feel like a prude for saying this but I'd never go down on a chick who's practically a stranger. Maybe with a dental dam, but then what'd be the point?

saymama
10-23-2005, 12:25 PM
i feel sorry for you, but more so for her. Oral gives you nothing but the hopeful promise of recipracation.

TonyFleecs
10-23-2005, 02:56 PM
Yet another crisis that could've been avoided if more people would just listen to Nas.

From the 'I Am' Album, Dr. Knockboots:

DON'T: eat the pussy the first night
Maker her bless you, we call that shit gesundheit
.... they call it gesundheit. :lol:

Victor Cabanelas
10-23-2005, 03:24 PM
If she passed out, you should have gave her an "anal punishment".

kari
10-23-2005, 03:29 PM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.
...well at least us ladies now know who to call when we can't sleep at night. ;)

Agent Desmond
10-23-2005, 03:57 PM
...well at least us ladies now know who to call when we can't sleep at night. ;)

He's probably faster than a bottle of NyQuil

Amos Moses
10-23-2005, 03:59 PM
Len you got to go down a girl, stop bitching and be grateful for what you have. And I highly doubt anyone can be put to sleep by sex, well, maybe after, but not during.

Blandy vs Terrorism
10-23-2005, 04:41 PM
love comes and goes but herpes will last forever
sig'd!

moonspider
10-23-2005, 04:43 PM
I can't belive that your cunnilingus skills are so weak it actually bored a chick to sleep.



oh buuuuuuuuuuuurn

amy
10-23-2005, 04:45 PM
Len you got to go down a girl, stop bitching and be grateful for what you have. And I highly doubt anyone can be put to sleep by sex, well, maybe after, but not during.


Oh, it's possible. Not all sex is good.

Amos Moses
10-23-2005, 04:46 PM
Oh, it's possible. Not all sex is good.


Yeah I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm just jealous >=(

amy
10-23-2005, 04:48 PM
Yeah I have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm just jealous >=(


Don't be jealous of that. He could have mouth cooties for going down on a random girl.

The Human Target
10-23-2005, 04:48 PM
i feel sorry for you, but more so for her. Oral gives you nothing but the hopeful promise of recipracation.

Heh. I need a shirt that says that.

Ryan Elliott
10-23-2005, 04:49 PM
Don't be jealous of that. He could have mouth cooties for going down on a random girl.



:lol: Mouth cooties.

Amos Moses
10-23-2005, 04:51 PM
:lol: Mouth cooties.


Ditto. Mouth Cooties.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 05:00 PM
Don't be jealous of that. He could have mouth cooties for going down on a random girl.
At what point did I say 'random'?

Shane W
10-23-2005, 07:11 PM
At what point did I say 'random'?

Well considering in your first post you said "party or something".. That something could have been a sewer cleaning facility for all we know.

Agent Desmond
10-23-2005, 07:14 PM
could have been a homeless girl crashing the party for free food and drink and a place to stay warm

Amos Moses
10-23-2005, 07:16 PM
could have been a homeless girl crashing the party for free food and drink and a place to stay warm
That would be a great line on a resume

Skills:

I fuck homeless girls.

Angel of Distraction
10-23-2005, 07:17 PM
And yet, I'd give my right nut for that...

You have nuts? I thought I had them in a jar in my basement. :mistrust:

Agent Desmond
10-23-2005, 07:18 PM
I don't know if that's a skill... That's like looking at fish in a barrel (I assume)

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 07:22 PM
I know... It's a damn shame, because everybody in my area code knows I'm the mu'fuckin' Cunnilingus King! :no:

Oh Yeah? I Totally Belive That.

Wayno.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:23 PM
Oh Yeah? I Totally Belive That.

Wayno.
Yeah? Lemme lick your cooch. ;-)

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 07:26 PM
Yeah? Lemme lick your cooch. ;-)

How Good Do You Have To Be For Everyone In The Area To Know? Or Is The Area Small?

Wayno.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:33 PM
How Good Do You Have To Be For Everyone In The Area To Know? Or Is The Area Small?

Wayno.
Lemme lick your cooch and see for yourself.

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 07:36 PM
Lemme lick your cooch and see for yourself.

Or Were Parts Of That Quote Metaphores I Didn't Pick Up On?

Wayno.

TheTravis!
10-23-2005, 07:37 PM
That was a beautiful story. I'm glad I didn't wait for the trade.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:38 PM
Or Were Parts Of That Quote Metaphores I Didn't Pick Up On?

Wayno.
Could be... Why don't you lemme lick your cooch, and we'll find out.

Okay, I'm done.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:39 PM
That was a beautiful story. I'm glad I didn't wait for the trade.
That's what we like to hear. Because of this, the series has been extended to another six issues of life.

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 07:40 PM
Could be... Why don't you lemme lick your cooch, and we'll find out.

Okay, I'm done.

Got Any Other Skills Everyone In The Area Knows About?

Wayno.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:41 PM
Got Any Other Skills Everyone In The Area Knows About?

Wayno.
Best smelling gas.

TheTravis!
10-23-2005, 07:42 PM
That's what we like to hear. Because of this, the series has been extended to another six issues of life.
Great. I would assume there is a lot of material for "The Adventures of Len As He Fails To Pleasure A Woman."

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:44 PM
Great. I would assume there is a lot of material for "The Adventures of Len As He Fails To Pleasure A Woman."
You know you'd all buy it.

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 07:44 PM
Best smelling gas.

No Way.

Wayno.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 07:48 PM
No Way.

Wayno.
Yeah, dude. Like roses and cherries.

Jacob Lyon Goddard
10-23-2005, 08:11 PM
could have been a homeless girl crashing the party for free food and drink and a place to stay warm
:nonono2:
been there

WAKKAJAWAKKA
10-23-2005, 08:12 PM
:nonono2:
been there

You Did A Homless Girl That Was Looking For Free Food And Drink?

Wayno.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 08:14 PM
:nonono2:
been there
Oh fuck, now I have something in common with Goddard... :surrend:

HoneyDippinDan
10-23-2005, 08:16 PM
Okay, so last night, I'm at a party or something, and I hook up with this chick. We start making out, soon she's naked, and I go down on her, and then she passes out and that's it... She's laying there passed out and naked and that's it.

So lame.
When out say she "passed out", was it due to the alchohol she consumed or was it because of the ether soaked rag being pressed against her face?

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 08:18 PM
When out say she "passed out", was it due to the alchohol she consumed or was it because of the ether soaked rag being pressed against her face?
C. All Of The Above.

alexlannin
10-23-2005, 08:22 PM
I have a friend in college who took that same opportunity to blow his load into the girl's hair.

joeAR
10-23-2005, 09:12 PM
And yet, I'd give my right nut for that...


Blueballs are not fun.

LenNWallace
10-23-2005, 09:14 PM
I have a friend in college who took that same opportunity to blow his load into the girl's hair.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!1111ONE1

Dread Pirate Wren
10-23-2005, 09:32 PM
Oh, it's possible. Not all sex is good.

Hells yes on this one. Also *titters* mouth cooties...PD you're my hero.

Justin.Strange
10-23-2005, 09:56 PM
wait, so you're munching away down there like Pac-Man and she just gets all narcopletic on you? hahaha! dude, if youre telling the truth, thats so sad...

niceguyeddie
10-23-2005, 10:12 PM
I have a friend in college who took that same opportunity to blow his load into the girl's hair.

i know this dude...
that teabagged a girl while she was asleep... frigging guy.

niceguyeddie
10-23-2005, 10:12 PM
You know you'd all buy it.

id wait for the hardcover. that way id get the special features.

t00lverine
10-23-2005, 10:59 PM
Haha, weak sauce. By the way, mouth cooties is the best pairing of two words I've heard all week.

Angel
10-23-2005, 11:52 PM
it's threads like this that remind me that i need more friends who are girls.

*announcer voice*
pussy lickens, it'll keep your cat coming back for more

Dread Pirate Wren
10-23-2005, 11:57 PM
it's threads like this that remind me that i need more friends who are girls.

*announcer voice*
pussy lickens, it'll keep your cat coming back for more

Angel! *pounces* Been ages!!

Hee hee hee...you totally do.

Angel
10-24-2005, 12:33 AM
Angel! *pounces* Been ages!!

Hee hee hee...you totally do.
i already counted you. that makes, one.

saymama
10-24-2005, 07:04 AM
i already counted you. that makes, one.

**cough cough**

t00lverine
10-24-2005, 07:07 AM
**cough cough**

You sick?

saymama
10-24-2005, 07:14 AM
You sick?

why you want some germs!!!!!

t00lverine
10-24-2005, 07:27 AM
why you want some germs!!!!!

What kinds have you got?:lol:

GabeLogan
10-24-2005, 07:37 AM
I so hope you are faking it for cheap laughs because that is just sad.

saymama
10-24-2005, 07:40 AM
What kinds have you got?:lol:


you want it alphabetically or in chronological order?

t00lverine
10-24-2005, 04:15 PM
you want it alphabetically or in chronological order?

Alphabetically, please.

saymama
10-24-2005, 04:30 PM
Alphabetically, please.


lol, :scared: :scared: :scared: :scared:

t00lverine
10-24-2005, 04:33 PM
lol, :scared: :scared: :scared: :scared:

No, no take your time. Actually, you can just have your doctor fax over your file.:lol:

saymama
10-24-2005, 04:34 PM
No, no take your time. Actually, you can just have your doctor fax over your file.:lol:

thanks for not making me go public with it. it's too long anyway!

t00lverine
10-24-2005, 04:36 PM
thanks for not making me go public with it. it's too long anyway!

Well, I think it's safe to say we sufficiently derailed this thread.:Oops:

saymama
10-24-2005, 04:52 PM
Well, I think it's safe to say we sufficiently derailed this thread.:Oops:

abso-postively

Angel
10-24-2005, 11:02 PM
**cough cough**
yeah, but i'm just friends with you to get to your husband ;)
just kidding. :lol:

saymama
10-25-2005, 04:47 AM
yeah, but i'm just friends with you to get to your husband ;)
just kidding. :lol:


as are most people! men and women alike! It's okay, I'm used to it. I take what I can! :D