alexlannin
09-13-2005, 08:04 AM
No looking back, evacuee says
The life she worked so hard to build in New Orleans is gone, Pamela Harris says, so she'll start from scratch in Portland
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
MICHELLE ROBERTS
Pamela Harris has lived in a constant state of uncertainty since Hurricane Katrina tore down her house and uprooted her community.
But after arriving in Portland late Saturday with nothing but her wallet and the clothes on her back, one thing became clear: She will not return to New Orleans to try to salvage her life.
"We've lost everything," the certified nursing assistant said Monday in a conference room at the Washington Square Shilo Inn in Beaverton, which has donated rooms to several families who arrived from the South over the weekend. "To go back is a waste of time; there's nothing that can be salvaged. Nothing. We need to rebuild our lives from this point forward."
Harris acknowledged she isn't sure whether strength or exhaustion fueled her decision. What she knows is that, at age 48, she never thought she'd be starting over.
Portland may not shelter the hundreds of hurricane evacuees who had been expected through the Federal Emergency Management Agency, but survivors such as Harris are arriving in large and small groups every day.
Harris, who was fortunate enough to salvage her car, drove to Portland in a three-vehicle caravan of nine family members. Among them were Harris' son, daughter and 5-month-old grandson, and another relative with two daughters, ages 9 and 2. The 9-year-old has cerebral palsy and is nourished through a feeding tube. The family was forced to leave the girl's wheelchair behind and has run out of her liquid nourishment.
The group chose this area for no other reason than Harris' daughter once lived in Portland and said it was "nice."
Harris, who cared for the elderly, said she worked for decades to pull herself up from food stamps to homeownership, dinners at nice restaurants and the $350 dress suits she likes to wear out on the town.
Accepting an Oregon Trail food stamp card and a bag of used clothing from the American Red Cross evoked an uneasy combination of feelings: gratitude and bitterness.
"They gave me a food stamp card -- something I haven't had in years," she said. "It is so hard to ask for things when you are used to doing for yourself.
"I'm not a refugee," she said, adding that she never would have dreamed she'd have to meet a roomful of reporters wearing jeans and tennis shoes. "I'm a taxpayer. A survivor. An overcomer."
Even so, Harris admitted, she often hides in her Shilo bathroom and cries. She said she must splash cold water on her face to make her reality seem real.
Her thoughts flip-flop between the life-altering and the mundane: Will she find a job? Did any of her friends die in the storm? Where can she get her hair done? What bills did she pay before the storm? How will all this affect her credit? Does it matter?
But for those in her group who are more vulnerable, Harris said she tries to stay upbeat and confident.
Dale Emanuel, spokeswoman for Goodwill Industries of the Columbia Willamette, said Monday that the organization is helping evacuees. The agency will assign a Goodwill ambassador to each family to coordinate services, including shopping trips, job placement programs, doctors visits and mental health treatment.
Harris is thankful for such help but knows true happiness and recovery rest on what she will be able to do for herself.
"Even though we're coming here with nothing, we're pioneers," said Harris. She has been promised a free place to live for the next few months until she gets on her feet.
"I would love to stay in Portland," she said. "But I don't want to live just anywhere. I would like a nice, quiet neighborhood. They say, 'Beggars can't be choosers.' But I'm not a beggar. I'm a taxpayer, so I have a right to be choosy."
She said she will try to forge her new life in Portland, where she has been finding comfort in the stunning mountain vistas and the tall, quiet trees.
"It's going to be a challenge," she said. "But I'm ready for the challenge."
Michelle Roberts: 503-294-5041; michelleroberts@news.oregonian.com
The life she worked so hard to build in New Orleans is gone, Pamela Harris says, so she'll start from scratch in Portland
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
MICHELLE ROBERTS
Pamela Harris has lived in a constant state of uncertainty since Hurricane Katrina tore down her house and uprooted her community.
But after arriving in Portland late Saturday with nothing but her wallet and the clothes on her back, one thing became clear: She will not return to New Orleans to try to salvage her life.
"We've lost everything," the certified nursing assistant said Monday in a conference room at the Washington Square Shilo Inn in Beaverton, which has donated rooms to several families who arrived from the South over the weekend. "To go back is a waste of time; there's nothing that can be salvaged. Nothing. We need to rebuild our lives from this point forward."
Harris acknowledged she isn't sure whether strength or exhaustion fueled her decision. What she knows is that, at age 48, she never thought she'd be starting over.
Portland may not shelter the hundreds of hurricane evacuees who had been expected through the Federal Emergency Management Agency, but survivors such as Harris are arriving in large and small groups every day.
Harris, who was fortunate enough to salvage her car, drove to Portland in a three-vehicle caravan of nine family members. Among them were Harris' son, daughter and 5-month-old grandson, and another relative with two daughters, ages 9 and 2. The 9-year-old has cerebral palsy and is nourished through a feeding tube. The family was forced to leave the girl's wheelchair behind and has run out of her liquid nourishment.
The group chose this area for no other reason than Harris' daughter once lived in Portland and said it was "nice."
Harris, who cared for the elderly, said she worked for decades to pull herself up from food stamps to homeownership, dinners at nice restaurants and the $350 dress suits she likes to wear out on the town.
Accepting an Oregon Trail food stamp card and a bag of used clothing from the American Red Cross evoked an uneasy combination of feelings: gratitude and bitterness.
"They gave me a food stamp card -- something I haven't had in years," she said. "It is so hard to ask for things when you are used to doing for yourself.
"I'm not a refugee," she said, adding that she never would have dreamed she'd have to meet a roomful of reporters wearing jeans and tennis shoes. "I'm a taxpayer. A survivor. An overcomer."
Even so, Harris admitted, she often hides in her Shilo bathroom and cries. She said she must splash cold water on her face to make her reality seem real.
Her thoughts flip-flop between the life-altering and the mundane: Will she find a job? Did any of her friends die in the storm? Where can she get her hair done? What bills did she pay before the storm? How will all this affect her credit? Does it matter?
But for those in her group who are more vulnerable, Harris said she tries to stay upbeat and confident.
Dale Emanuel, spokeswoman for Goodwill Industries of the Columbia Willamette, said Monday that the organization is helping evacuees. The agency will assign a Goodwill ambassador to each family to coordinate services, including shopping trips, job placement programs, doctors visits and mental health treatment.
Harris is thankful for such help but knows true happiness and recovery rest on what she will be able to do for herself.
"Even though we're coming here with nothing, we're pioneers," said Harris. She has been promised a free place to live for the next few months until she gets on her feet.
"I would love to stay in Portland," she said. "But I don't want to live just anywhere. I would like a nice, quiet neighborhood. They say, 'Beggars can't be choosers.' But I'm not a beggar. I'm a taxpayer, so I have a right to be choosy."
She said she will try to forge her new life in Portland, where she has been finding comfort in the stunning mountain vistas and the tall, quiet trees.
"It's going to be a challenge," she said. "But I'm ready for the challenge."
Michelle Roberts: 503-294-5041; michelleroberts@news.oregonian.com