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Tyr
06-12-2011, 01:15 AM
Make all your inflammatory comments about video games here.

I'll start it off. Ninja Gaiden's Ryu is gay. I don't care how many bouncing mammaries they surround him with, that man is gay. Just accept it.

The Hodag
06-12-2011, 01:22 AM
Final Fantasy games have the worst gameplay ever and are only worth it for their ridiculously melodramatic stories, pretty graphics, and cool music. And even then, only sometimes.

stevapalooza
06-12-2011, 02:45 AM
As much as I love the actual gameplay in the Metal Gear Solid games, I think the story is incomprehensible, and I don't get why people are always praising it. Those long, droning cut scenes are the bane of all MGS games.

costello
06-12-2011, 04:38 AM
Sony should be just as ashamed as Microsoft was, because a $600 system with all sorts of capabilities should have a much longer shelf life.

Matt Jay
06-12-2011, 04:52 AM
Everything sucks. Meh.

Bervda
06-12-2011, 05:05 AM
Sony should be just as ashamed as Microsoft was, because a $600 system with all sorts of capabilities should have a much longer shelf life.

It came out in 2006 and hasn't been replaced. What's your deal?

DaveCummings
06-12-2011, 05:12 AM
It came out in 2006 and hasn't been replaced. What's your deal?

Because with all their technological advantages, they still have to rip off whatever innovations Nintendo comes up with.

costello
06-12-2011, 06:16 AM
It came out in 2006 and hasn't been replaced. What's your deal?

I really started using it for Netflix in the last year. Alas, now it's dead.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 06:28 AM
Yes, Sony and MS decided to capitalize on the motion control phenomena and both did it better (especially Kinect). But this tired old argument that everyone rips off Nintendo is ridiculous and wrong on many fronts.

Nintendo is now trying to "copy" MS and Sony by releasing a system in a year and a half that will already be outdated. Why? Because no one is buying their shitty fad system anymore.
Oh, and Nintendo fucking sucks and shouldn't be played by anyone over the age of 13.

And I seriously wonder about adults who still play Pokemon.

Just playing along with the thread, no disrespect intended for any of my fellow boarders. : )

Kelly Tindall
06-12-2011, 06:41 AM
There is too much violence in video games, and not enough sex.

Foolish Mortal
06-12-2011, 06:48 AM
And I seriously wonder about adults who still play Pokemon.
As opposed to adults who play Wrestling Games? :cool:

The thing that bugs me about younger gamers is their increasing concern over how graphics look over story and gameplay.

Gameplay and story should always come first. Always.

Cactusakic
06-12-2011, 06:49 AM
To paraphrase something Todd recently said about the film Boondock Saints (at least, I think it was Todd, if I am giving credit to the wrong poster then I apologize):

The Call Of Duty games are the "bro" litmus test of video games.

Not everyone who likes them is a bro, but all bro's like them.

Same goes for Halo.

Imo, both franchises are startlingly average and don't deserve half the praise and adoration regularly heaped upon them, but I will confess I'm not one for online multiplayer and most people tell me that the multiplayer aspect is what makes both franchises so great.

As far as single-player campaigns go though, the definition of mediocrity.

CoD4 was pretty good, I guess, with a couple of genuinely excellent moments, but the rest? Meh.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 06:54 AM
As opposed to adults who play Wrestling Games? :cool:

The thing that bugs me about younger gamers is their increasing concern over how graphics look over story and gameplay.

Gameplay and story should always come first. Always.

Sure. Wrestling is geared toward males of all ages and in many cases specifically not for kids Pokemon is geared toward Japanese toddlers.

Foolish Mortal
06-12-2011, 07:07 AM
Sure. Wrestling is geared toward males of all ages and in many cases specifically not for kids Pokemon is geared toward Japanese toddlers.
I can assure you, Pokemon is tremendously popular amongst teenagers and adults in Japan.

Pokemon at its core is a strategy game and can reach a fair level of complexity depending on how far you want to take it.

Ryudo
06-12-2011, 07:30 AM
Oh, and Nintendo fucking sucks and shouldn't be played by anyone over the age of 13.


:lol:

Nintendo has franchises that are the linchpins of the video game industry.

Honestly, how many good Sonic games have there been since Sonic and Knuckles, or Sonic Adventure 1?

Other "mascot" franchises have gone by the wayside.

Nintendo continues to turn out quality Mario, Zelda, Metroid, and other games (Donkey Kong Country Returns, Kirby's Epic Yarn).

Sure, the Mario franchise may have had some mis-steps (Super Mario Sunshine, I believe, wasn't as well received as other entries), but those properties have a lot more hits than misses.

Ryudo
06-12-2011, 07:30 AM
Potentially inflammatory opinion:

EA still hasn't made a football game as good as NFL 2k5.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 07:42 AM
Ninja Gaiden's Ryu fucks men. I don't care padfhlbxlgjapoufagh. He likes to put throbbing cock in his mouth and take hard wood in his cellar. I know that this fictional character loves rough, gay anal sex.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 07:43 AM
Just accept it. Or don't. Because that's a dumb comment.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 07:44 AM
:lol:

Nintendo has franchises that are the linchpins of the video game industry.

Honestly, how many good Sonic games have there been since Sonic and Knuckles, or Sonic Adventure 1?

Other "mascot" franchises have gone by the wayside.

Nintendo continues to turn out quality Mario, Zelda, Metroid, and other games (Donkey Kong Country Returns, Kirby's Epic Yarn).

Sure, the Mario franchise may have had some mis-steps (Super Mario Sunshine, I believe, wasn't as well received as other entries), but those properties have a lot more hits than misses.

Yep. I don't get how anyone could place some arbitrary age limit on Nintendo games. They're still awesome.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 07:46 AM
Potentially inflammatory opinion:

EA still hasn't made a football game as good as NFL 2k5.

I agree.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 07:46 AM
To paraphrase something Todd recently said about the film Boondock Saints (at least, I think it was Todd, if I am giving credit to the wrong poster then I apologize):

The Call Of Duty games are the "bro" litmus test of video games.

Not everyone who likes them is a bro, but all bro's like them.

Same goes for Halo.

Imo, both franchises are startlingly average and don't deserve half the praise and adoration regularly heaped upon them, but I will confess I'm not one for online multiplayer and most people tell me that the multiplayer aspect is what makes both franchises so great.

As far as single-player campaigns go though, the definition of mediocrity.

CoD4 was pretty good, I guess, with a couple of genuinely excellent moments, but the rest? Meh.

Yes, that was me. I'm hilarious. You're welcome, all!

Also, it's not COD's fault for having the most intuitive console FPS gameplay and online multiplayer match-making system. More shooters should strive for that level of accessibility.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 07:53 AM
Nintendo is now trying to "copy" MS and Sony by releasing a system in a year and a half that will already be outdated. Why? Because no one is buying their shitty fad system anymore.
Oh, and Nintendo fucking sucks and shouldn't be played by anyone over the age of 13.

You mean that system that moved 30 million units in the US alone and became more profitable than their last console? You're referring to the best selling console of the current generation domestically and world-wide? That console that infiltrated the mainstream consciousness in a way that other consoles failed to do? They're not selling as many because of market saturation. Wii was an unmitigated success in every conceivable way.

Ryudo
06-12-2011, 07:58 AM
The reason the PSP failed was because it was doing things that people were beginning to be able to do on their phones, for more money, without a wireless data plan, and with little disc thingies you had to carry around.

The DS is a success because of name recognition and its obvious pandering to children. However, the 3DS will not be as successful due to its price point.

Also, parents of children with portable gaming systems: get your kids' fricking heads out of the things when they're out in public. It's one thing to let them play them in cars while driving, another to have them walking around in a Walmart or Target with Spongebob in their face.

Ryudo
06-12-2011, 08:09 AM
Until GTA IV came out cross-platform, the PS3 was a Blu-ray player that also played Uncharted.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 08:36 AM
You mean that system that moved 30 million units in the US alone and became more profitable than their last console? You're referring to the best selling console of the current generation domestically and world-wide? That console that infiltrated the mainstream consciousness in a way that other consoles failed to do? They're not selling as many because of market saturation. Wii was an unmitigated success in every conceivable way.

Wii was a fad bought for children, old farts, and yuppies who wanted to be cool. Not unlike the pet rock.

Kirblar
06-12-2011, 08:38 AM
Until GTA IV came out cross-platform, the PS3 was a Blu-ray player that also played Uncharted.
I don't think there's any argument on that one. :lol: The price point killed its ability to penetrate the market for a very long time.

Bill!
06-12-2011, 10:40 AM
The Xbox 360 handles Netflix like a 110 year old woman rides a skateboard.

Bill!
06-12-2011, 10:41 AM
Until GTA IV came out cross-platform, the PS3 was a Blu-ray player that also played Uncharted.

You're forgetting a lot of great games in there. I owned the 360 first, then Wii, then PS3, and the PS3 is far and above my favorite of the systems.

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 10:44 AM
Yes, Sony and MS decided to capitalize on the motion control phenomena and both did it better (especially Kinect). But this tired old argument that everyone rips off Nintendo is ridiculous and wrong on many fronts.

Nintendo is now trying to "copy" MS and Sony by releasing a system in a year and a half that will already be outdated. Why? Because no one is buying their shitty fad system anymore.
Oh, and Nintendo fucking sucks and shouldn't be played by anyone over the age of 13.

And I seriously wonder about adults who still play Pokemon.

Just playing along with the thread, no disrespect intended for any of my fellow boarders. : )

Wow Brad you're being awful catty today. I could give a crap if you don't like the system, but putting down people who play their games? That's just taking it a step too far. No disrespect intended doesn't save it from being disrespectful man.

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 10:45 AM
I can assure you, Pokemon is tremendously popular amongst teenagers and adults in Japan.

Pokemon at its core is a strategy game and can reach a fair level of complexity depending on how far you want to take it.

And in America. You wouldn't believe how many people at my college play Pokemon. Removing the cute aspect aside, it's a fun and complex game.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 10:46 AM
Wii was a fad bought for children, old farts, and yuppies who wanted to be cool. Not unlike the pet rock.

Why are you wrong about everything?

Bill!
06-12-2011, 10:56 AM
Wii was a fad bought for children, old farts, and yuppies who wanted to be cool. Not unlike the pet rock.

Legend of Zelda, Super Mario Bros. Mario Galaxy 1, 2, Resident Evil Chronicles 1, 2, Mario Kart, Metroid, Dead Space Extraction, and others, would very much disagree with you.

Kirblar
06-12-2011, 11:03 AM
Wow Brad you're being awful catty today. I could give a crap if you don't like the system, but putting down people who play their games? That's just taking it a step too far. No disrespect intended doesn't save it from being disrespectful man.
"What the fuck is subjectivity!"

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 11:13 AM
"What the fuck is subjectivity!"
:roll:

Kirblar
06-12-2011, 11:16 AM
:roll:
That was directed at Brad, not you. :lol:

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 11:16 AM
That was directed at Brad, not you. :lol:

Ah, sorry dude.

Tyr
06-12-2011, 12:44 PM
Just accept it. Or don't. Because that's a dumb comment.

Oh please girlfriend, the evidence is all there. Ryu has absolutely no chemistry with any of the female characters in the series, none. Say what you want about Peter Parker, but at least he had SOME chemistry with Mary Jane. And Ryu is showing off way to much ass to be an Asexual. He's gay.


Because with all their technological advantages, they still have to rip off whatever innovations Nintendo comes up with.

Ok I'm going to drop another inflammatory comment here, that's a lot less tongue and cheek. I'm sick and tired of everyone chanting the word "innovation" like some holy mantra. First I'm a firm believer in nihil novi sub sole. Second, just because someone has a good idea or concept doesn't immediately translate into a good game or device. Nor does having said good game or device immediately invalidate anything that copies it's original formula and builds upon it.

Yes, Nintendo was the first to come up with thumb sticks and rumble features. Sony came along and improved on that idea. They didn't come up with those ideas, they made them better. And I'm willing to bet Nintendo didn't come up with those ideas either.

Here's another one Gears of War wasn't the first Cover Based shooter, Epic said that the got the idea from Namco's Kill Switch from the PS2, and Namco may have gotten the idea from an even earlier from an n64 game called Operation Winback. Epic did it better with Gears of War.

And let's talk sandbox games shall we, GTA III was NOT the first Sandbox game out there. Bethesda has been doing the sandbox thing with their Elder Scrolls series a lot longer then they had. And there where some non RPG sandbox types that predate GTA III such as Hunter.

Anyway point of this whole long rant in one short sentence is just because something's been done before doesn't make it bad.

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 12:47 PM
Yeah but it's not like the Kinect or Move are any better. It's been shovelware for the most part. If they were done better than Wii that'd be great. Everything done in the industry stems from somewhere obviously.

Foolish Mortal
06-12-2011, 12:49 PM
Auto manufacturers borrow concepts and innovations from each other all the time. And sometimes even improve upon them.

Computer and electronics manufacturers do the same thing.

Tyr
06-12-2011, 01:27 PM
Yeah but it's not like the Kinect or Move are any better. It's been shovelware for the most part. If they were done better than Wii that'd be great. Everything done in the industry stems from somewhere obviously.

I think the Move is pretty much dead, it's something that Sony just did and got out of the way.

From the sound of things, it sounds like Microsoft is taking a different approach. As I recall there was talk a year ago that devs where reaching the limit of the 360's capabilities. So they're using the kinect to extend the life of their console. That's not to say that that the system is dead yet or it's becoming all kinect all the time, they still have some great titles coming out for the system. But the impressions I get from their press conference is they're pushing the kinect for all its worth.

Josh V
06-12-2011, 01:32 PM
Haven't bought a nintendo product since the snes and don't regret it one iota. I have yet to see something from them that makes me want the product

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 01:33 PM
Haven't bought a nintendo product since the snes and don't regret it one iota. I have yet to see something from them that makes me want the product

Well hey man, different strokes different folks. :)

Josh V
06-12-2011, 01:36 PM
Well hey man, different strokes different folks. :)

I've owned psone, dreamcast,ps2, xbox, and ps3. I don't do mobile game systems, and I loathe most fps's. Fucking halo spawned a thousand cheap knock offs and stupid online players

The Hodag
06-12-2011, 01:55 PM
Wii was a fad bought for children, old farts, and yuppies who wanted to be cool. Not unlike the pet rock.

I wouldn't go with quite such a specific breakdown - I'm a casual gamer who got roped in - but I tend to agree that it was a fad. I feel the same way about the Kinect and most motion control high concepts.

costello
06-12-2011, 02:10 PM
The Xbox 360 handles Netflix like a 110 year old woman rides a skateboard.

Ever use Netflix on a blu-ray player? It's like an interactive game. The movie turns off randomly and it's up to you to find the last place you were at.

costello
06-12-2011, 02:14 PM
Haven't bought a nintendo product since the snes and don't regret it one iota. I have yet to see something from them that makes me want the product

I spent about $500 or more on the wii. My family rarely played it and we just gave it away for free.

costello
06-12-2011, 02:15 PM
Well hey man, different strokes different folks. :)

Before you rag on me, I agree.

Tyr
06-12-2011, 02:49 PM
Haven't bought a nintendo product since the snes and don't regret it one iota. I have yet to see something from them that makes me want the product

Yeah I'm not really feeling it either right now, the Wii U controller just looks bulky and unnecessary. I might pick up a 3ds though, mainly cause I heard it's got more processing power then the DS, then the gimmick. But I'll wait awhile for its lineup to build.

Ashwin Pande
06-12-2011, 02:53 PM
The guy in LA Noire is the world's worst detective.

Ashwin Pande
06-12-2011, 02:55 PM
Why the hell does Marvel still give all their movie tie-in games to Sega? They've fucked up 4 out of 4 games so far. Why go back to that well of poison?

I'd like to be able to play a Marvel superhero game that doesn't suck. And from what I've seen so far Sega isn't the company to be able to do that.

Tyr
06-12-2011, 03:06 PM
The guy in LA Noire is the world's worst detective.

But he does kick ass when it comes to being an account man in advertising.


Why the hell does Marvel still give all their movie tie-in games to Sega? They've fucked up 4 out of 4 games so far. Why go back to that well of poison?

I'd like to be able to play a Marvel superhero game that doesn't suck. And from what I've seen so far Sega isn't the company to be able to do that.

Well the alternative is going back to Activision, unless you count Capcom, who really only went back for the fighting game.

Also Sega has made a few good games recently, not many, but a few.

...I think I'm going to drop my gamecard and go back to the generic PS3 one, Ninja Gaiden Sigma II was the last game I got a trophy on, so that's correct, but the count is all screwed up. It doesn't seem to want to count my Fallout: New Vegas trophies, even though its currently showing them.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 04:47 PM
The Xbox 360 handles Netflix like a 110 year old woman rides a skateboard.

What? Are you on dial-up, Bill? I never have a problem. Instant streaming in full HD in no time at all and rarely have less than four bars and very rarely have an interruption.

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 04:49 PM
I wouldn't go with quite such a specific breakdown - I'm a casual gamer who got roped in - but I tend to agree that it was a fad. I feel the same way about the Kinect and most motion control high concepts.

Sure, but I see potential with Kinect with stuff like mass effect three and forza 4

Brad N.
06-12-2011, 04:55 PM
But he does kick ass when it comes to being an account man in advertising.

Well the alternative is going back to Activision, unless you count Capcom, who really only went back for the fighting game.

Also Sega has made a few good games recently, not many, but a few.

...I think I'm going to drop my gamecard and go back to the generic PS3 one, Ninja Gaiden Sigma II was the last game I got a trophy on, so that's correct, but the count is all screwed up. It doesn't seem to want to count my Fallout: New Vegas trophies, even though its currently showing them.

Activision still makes Marvel games. Sega just handles movie tie-ins. Horribly. Activision has had their stinkers too, bit they have made some pretty solid Marvel games too when they don't farm them out to shitty side studios.

Masculine Todd
06-12-2011, 05:16 PM
Tyr, how much chemistry do you have with busty, attractive women?

lol u gay

Benel Germosen
06-12-2011, 05:50 PM
Square Enix has absolutely no idea what they're doing.

Tyr
06-12-2011, 07:22 PM
Tyr, how much chemistry do you have with busty, attractive women?

lol u gay

Asexual actually, so no I don't have a lot of romantic involvement with women of any shape or size, nor do I have a lot of desire to. That goes for men as well.

But I also don't go running around in ultra tight leather pants.


Square Enix has absolutely no idea what they're doing.

Benel, this is the thread for inflammatory video game stuff, not the thread for video game stuff we already know. ;-)

Humphrey_Lee
06-12-2011, 10:36 PM
Potentially inflammatory opinion:

EA still hasn't made a football game as good as NFL 2k5.

Fucking :hearted:

Humphrey_Lee
06-12-2011, 10:38 PM
If you got a RROD and went out and bought another 360, you're a masochist and it's easy to see why you read comics =)

Humphrey_Lee
06-12-2011, 10:39 PM
L.A. Noire is just Night Trap with the cast of Mad Men...




....(I can't take credit for that though, I basically paraphrased a review I read somewhere).

The Hodag
06-12-2011, 10:44 PM
What? Are you on dial-up, Bill? I never have a problem. Instant streaming in full HD in no time at all and rarely have less than four bars and very rarely have an interruption.

Same here. Do you just have a bad connection in your area or other stuff hogging bandwidth (this is my brother's problem)?

My stuff loads fast, usually has an excellent picture.

Humphrey_Lee
06-12-2011, 10:46 PM
The fact that something like Call of Duty has become the benchmark for sales of the industry is pathetic and I really don't get anyone who continues to buy that thing year in and out. I'm down with a shooter here and there, sure, but games like Uncharted 3 and Arkham City and Skyrim et al are hitting this year and people are really going to spend time and money on what basically boils down to a five hour campaign that plays out like a shitty Tom Clancey novel where all the action happens in corridors and a multiplayer mode that's only "different" because it has 20-year-old RPG elements in it? Even Bulletstorm is infinitely better, because it bothers to have actual gameplay. And it's story is essentially eight hours of variations of the word "dick"...

Slewo.O
06-12-2011, 11:12 PM
The fact that something like Call of Duty has become the benchmark for sales of the industry is pathetic and I really don't get anyone who continues to buy that thing year in and out. I'm down with a shooter here and there, sure, but games like Uncharted 3 and Arkham City and Skyrim et al are hitting this year and people are really going to spend time and money on what basically boils down to a five hour campaign that plays out like a shitty Tom Clancey novel where all the action happens in corridors and a multiplayer mode that's only "different" because it has 20-year-old RPG elements in it? Even Bulletstorm is infinitely better, because it bothers to have actual gameplay. And it's story is essentially eight hours of variations of the word "dick"...

:heart: :heart: :heart:

c. page
06-13-2011, 12:06 AM
Wii was a fad bought for children, old farts, and yuppies who wanted to be cool. Not unlike the pet rock.

I would counter this with saying that the people who play "casual games" are far more passionate about their games than most of the hardcore gamers that I've met or talked to.


Potentially inflammatory opinion:

EA still hasn't made a football game as good as NFL 2k5.

Absolutely right. 2k5 is still the benchmark for football games.


What? Are you on dial-up, Bill? I never have a problem. Instant streaming in full HD in no time at all and rarely have less than four bars and very rarely have an interruption.

I prefer it on the PS3, personally. But that's largely due to the remote that I have for that.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 04:48 AM
The fact that something like Call of Duty has become the benchmark for sales of the industry is pathetic and I really don't get anyone who continues to buy that thing year in and out. I'm down with a shooter here and there, sure, but games like Uncharted 3 and Arkham City and Skyrim et al are hitting this year and people are really going to spend time and money on what basically boils down to a five hour campaign that plays out like a shitty Tom Clancey novel where all the action happens in corridors and a multiplayer mode that's only "different" because it has 20-year-old RPG elements in it? Even Bulletstorm is infinitely better, because it bothers to have actual gameplay. And it's story is essentially eight hours of variations of the word "dick"...

You essentially have to buy each edition if you're craving a strong online experience. The outmoded games bleed users once the latest edition is released.

Irregardless, CoD is a fantastic, accessible and inuitive console shooter. The match-making system's good, those "RPG elements" you describe add depth and lend an element of strategy in how you outfit your character while giving their multiplayer mode even more incentive to play, and, you know, it's fun. Few multiplayer console games have as much post-release content created.

The single player campaigns suck, but that's hardly a detriment for most of its fanbase.

UltimateFactor
06-13-2011, 04:49 AM
Eh, I can't really blanket hate anything in the gaming industry. They cater to such a wide variety of gamers that there aren't really any lines to cross. I'm a big RPG gamer, mostly JRPG with a few excellent western RPG's like Bioware's stuff and the more Diablo type dungeon crawlers thrown into the mix. I like action games, anything resembling God Of War/Devil May Cry [I could care less how much they clone those types of systems, I love them.] Fighting games, and the occasional shooter. I was never really into first person shooters until MW2 came out and my brother got me into it. I don't really know what to say. It's probably the best pick up and play game I've taken up. I have all the systems, and while the Wii is definitely the one I play the least, almost not at all really, it's not really a fault of theirs. They just don't have many games I like to play. If there's anything that I'd bitch about when it comes to the game industry is narrow minded gamers always bitching and talking shit about crap that doesn't even matter.

OMG this game is just a bad clone of this one! Hey dude, if you like this game you suck ass because it sucks and now you do too! Fuck anyone like that. I'll play what the fuck I want to play and until they start buying my games, I'll like what the hell I want.

I liked Final Fantasy 13, does that make me a mindless fanboy? No, it makes me someone who fuckin' liked FF 13, plain and simple. People like that just get under my skin. :surrend:

Bill!
06-13-2011, 05:14 AM
What? Are you on dial-up, Bill? I never have a problem. Instant streaming in full HD in no time at all and rarely have less than four bars and very rarely have an interruption.

I used the PS3 exclusively until PSN went down. When I used 360 during that time, it was a nightmare. The menus are worse, the picture resolution takes forever to update, and it just wasn't a pleasant experience.

Benel Germosen
06-13-2011, 05:45 AM
Benel, this is the thread for inflammatory video game stuff, not the thread for video game stuff we already know. ;-)

Right, right.


Legacy of Kain was fucking awesome.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 05:51 AM
Sometimes, I play CoD while sucking dick so as to ensure that anyone observing knows I'm as gay as luminary Ninja Gaiden protagonist and notable homosexual Ryu.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 05:53 AM
All games should just be Call of Duty.

Cth
06-13-2011, 06:04 AM
Sony deserved all the hacks they've dealt with recently.

And based on some of the battered-wife-syndrome type posts from some Sony fans during the downtime -- they did too.

adam_warlock_2099
06-13-2011, 06:50 AM
After reading this thread, gamers may just be more anal than comic book readers.

Play what you like and fuck the rest. Otherwise your gonna die young and lonely from a heart attack. Quite possibly with your dick in your hand.

The Hodag
06-13-2011, 07:07 AM
Sony deserved all the hacks they've dealt with recently.

And based on some of the battered-wife-syndrome type posts from some Sony fans during the downtime -- they did too.

See, I think this is a little crazy, but it's EXACTLY what the thread calls for. Fuckin' be inflammatory! No apologies in this thread!

Marcdachamp
06-13-2011, 07:11 AM
And in America. You wouldn't believe how many people at my college play Pokemon. Removing the cute aspect aside, it's a fun and complex game.

I'm 25 and I bought Pokemon Black the day it came out.

Cth
06-13-2011, 07:23 AM
See, I think this is a little crazy, but it's EXACTLY what the thread calls for. Fuckin' be inflammatory! No apologies in this thread!

Figured I'd start with the big guns first. :lol:

Seriously though, even after all of this Sony STILL hasn't taken security seriously. If they don't care, why should I?

Brad N.
06-13-2011, 07:34 AM
I used the PS3 exclusively until PSN went down. When I used 360 during that time, it was a nightmare. The menus are worse, the picture resolution takes forever to update, and it just wasn't a pleasant experience.

Sorry it sucked for ya, broski. I've had nothing but joy with mine.

The Hodag
06-13-2011, 07:34 AM
Seriously though, even after all of this Sony STILL hasn't taken security seriously. If they don't care, why should I?

I think I just take exception at the notion that ANYONE deserves to be hacked, but I get where you're coming from and in this thread I don't care if you justify yourself anyway. ¡Viva la Revolución!

Also: the Street Fighter games all suck. They're the visual and audio equivalent of a grand mal seizure.

And, no, of course I can't play them worth shit.

Foolish Mortal
06-13-2011, 07:37 AM
I think I just take exception at the notion that ANYONE deserves to be hacked, but I get where you're coming from and in this thread I don't care if you justify yourself anyway. ¡Viva la Revolución!
If you're a multi-billion dollar corporation and you're using security measures from a decade ago, you deserve anything bad that happens to you.

The Hodag
06-13-2011, 07:46 AM
If you're a multi-billion dollar corporation and you're using security measures from a decade ago, you deserve anything bad that happens to you.

Including...MURDER?!!!

:scared:

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 07:48 AM
After reading this thread, gamers may just be more anal than comic book readers.

Play what you like and fuck the rest. Otherwise your gonna die young and lonely from a heart attack. Quite possibly with your dick in your hand.

Well, that's the ultimate point isn't it? But this is where we're supposed to say "Call of Duty fucking sucks like one of Todd's most vivid dreams" (love you Todd!) and not offend anyone. 15 million people play CoD, obviously I'm in the minority on it. While I'm at it though, a station wagon with four flat tires handles like less than a brick than does the Gears of War characters. Subway Jared back when he was the size of three people moved faster too. That game is also boring as hell but hey, the guns have chainsaws on them so GOTY, right?

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 08:18 AM
This article is kind of inflammatory, while also being completely right about where games might go if we're not careful: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-6-most-ominous-trends-in-video-games/

Slewo.O
06-13-2011, 08:21 AM
I'm 25 and I bought Pokemon Black the day it came out.

No wonder nobody likes you Marc! :no:

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 08:28 AM
No wonder nobody likes you Marc! :no:

Marc likes hockey and roots for my second favorite team, so we're cool. Of course, these recent developments diminish him in my eyes a bit...

DaveCummings
06-13-2011, 08:36 AM
I never use any of the systems for what they are really made for. The PS3, I mainly use just as a Blu-Ray player, the 360, for Netflix, and the Wii for the Virtual console. The last 2 games I bought and played was Arkham Asylum and Marvel vs Capcom 3.

McAfee
06-13-2011, 08:47 AM
Including...MURDER?!!!

:scared:

I clearly need to upgrade my security...I don't wanna die!!!

Marcdachamp
06-13-2011, 09:18 AM
Marc likes hockey and roots for my second favorite team, so we're cool. Of course, these recent developments diminish him in my eyes a bit...

That post started out so nice. :cry:

Bill!
06-13-2011, 09:24 AM
Sony deserved all the hacks they've dealt with recently.

And based on some of the battered-wife-syndrome type posts from some Sony fans during the downtime -- they did too.

Yeah, Cth, people deserve to be criminally attacked. Brilliant.

adam_warlock_2099
06-13-2011, 09:31 AM
Well, that's the ultimate point isn't it? But this is where we're supposed to say "Call of Duty fucking sucks like one of Todd's most vivid dreams" (love you Todd!) and not offend anyone. 15 million people play CoD, obviously I'm in the minority on it. While I'm at it though, a station wagon with four flat tires handles like less than a brick than does the Gears of War characters. Subway Jared back when he was the size of three people moved faster too. That game is also boring as hell but hey, the guns have chainsaws on them so GOTY, right?

:lol:

Sorry I should be more abrasive and less compliment when I post on the internet. I didn't realize that if I didn't shove my opinion down someone's throat like a cock that no one would even read my post. You Mr Lee have given me great insight.

Here let me try ....

Its obvious all FPS suck sour ass. What the fuck do you want to stare at the barrel of a gun for five hours. Your totally getting ripped off cause the companies don't even have to model a character into the game. Third person games rock. Looking at a guy's ass for 5 hours is better than your stupid gun barrel! Anyone that plays FPS is obviously retarded on a level far above the normal!

Like that?

xclk07
06-13-2011, 09:34 AM
This article is kind of inflammatory, while also being completely right about where games might go if we're not careful: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-6-most-ominous-trends-in-video-games/

I agree 100% with this article. Good premise and good follow-up. The only bright spot is that if no-one knows what the future is, someone will come along, exploit that need, and wow us with something we can't even see coming!

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 10:43 AM
:lol:

Sorry I should be more abrasive and less compliment when I post on the internet. I didn't realize that if I didn't shove my opinion down someone's throat like a cock that no one would even read my post. You Mr Lee have given me great insight.

Here let me try ....

Its obvious all FPS suck sour ass. What the fuck do you want to stare at the barrel of a gun for five hours. Your totally getting ripped off cause the companies don't even have to model a character into the game. Third person games rock. Looking at a guy's ass for 5 hours is better than your stupid gun barrel! Anyone that plays FPS is obviously retarded on a level far above the normal!

Like that?

Whoa man, tone it down a bit. No reason to get so harsh =)

I've said before, I'm down with an FPS here and there, I just don't really get why CoD was so heavily latched onto. Campaign is nothing special, there's really no gameplay mechanics in the thing other than looking down sights and aiming for the other guy (and occasionally shaking off an attack dog) and the multi is the same thing with perks. And the game has absolutely no personality outside of Cpt. Price. Meh. Bioshock, now there's an FPS (which also happens to have terrible FPS mechanics, but makes up for it by everything else being awesome). And I'm actually looking forward to Rage now that I've seen more of it too.

PatrickA
06-13-2011, 10:43 AM
Asexual actually, so no I don't have a lot of romantic involvement with women of any shape or size, nor do I have a lot of desire to. That goes for men as well.

But I also don't go running around in ultra tight leather pants.

You should give ultra tight leather pants a try!


Sometimes, I play CoD while sucking dick so as to ensure that anyone observing knows I'm as gay as luminary Ninja Gaiden protagonist and notable homosexual Ryu.

There should be a perk associated with that.

adam_warlock_2099
06-13-2011, 11:04 AM
Whoa man, tone it down a bit. No reason to get so harsh =)

I've said before, I'm down with an FPS here and there, I just don't really get why CoD was so heavily latched onto. Campaign is nothing special, there's really no gameplay mechanics in the thing other than looking down sights and aiming for the other guy (and occasionally shaking off an attack dog) and the multi is the same thing with perks. And the game has absolutely no personality outside of Cpt. Price. Meh. Bioshock, now there's an FPS (which also happens to have terrible FPS mechanics, but makes up for it by everything else being awesome). And I'm actually looking forward to Rage now that I've seen more of it too.

The only FPS I've played to any extent is Halo, and that's because for some reason I thought that the games would get better, but they haven't and the first one is still the best one. Probably the only FPS I play by choice on my own. (Though my son got hooked on em and I play with him, but still haven'f finished ODST.)

I totally agree with you on the play mechanics of Bioshock, but not that the story compels me to play it despite that handicap. I've tried numerous times with extended periods of time in between and I still can't manage to play it without frustration. Really one of the few games I can think of that had horrible controls but was compelling enough to overshadow it was Silent Hill.

Now Dark Sector ... that's a game, for me, where the controls are so fluid and so fun, that I can still play through the campaign and be entertained.

Marcdachamp
06-13-2011, 11:09 AM
Ever use Netflix on a blu-ray player? It's like an interactive game. The movie turns off randomly and it's up to you to find the last place you were at.

Really? I own a blu-ray player, a Wii and a PS3. The blu-ray player was the first thing I owned that streamed Netflix to my TV (Wii didn't have it yet, and my PS3 is 4 months old) and I've had, maybe, a handful of issues ever. If that.

Tyr
06-13-2011, 12:59 PM
Sometimes, I play CoD while sucking dick so as to ensure that anyone observing knows I'm as gay as luminary Ninja Gaiden protagonist and notable homosexual Ryu.

Just for the record, I said Ryu was gay, I never said he likes to give head. As I have no evidence to support whether or not he does in fact give head. Therefore I can not comment on Ryu's alleged cock sucking activities.


You should give ultra tight leather pants a try!


I dunno, wouldn't those things chaff?

Cth
06-13-2011, 02:30 PM
This article is kind of inflammatory, while also being completely right about where games might go if we're not careful: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-6-most-ominous-trends-in-video-games/

Heh, David Wong's great and inflammatory is the right word :D

I remember some of the stuff they used to post back when they were Pointless Waste of Time.

costello
06-13-2011, 02:32 PM
Really? I own a blu-ray player, a Wii and a PS3. The blu-ray player was the first thing I owned that streamed Netflix to my TV (Wii didn't have it yet, and my PS3 is 4 months old) and I've had, maybe, a handful of issues ever. If that.

Wow. Man, I want your electronics. :) Every time I use my blu-ray player for netflix, I get it for 3-5 minutes and it shuts down. Usually when I run it a second time it works.

Foolish Mortal
06-13-2011, 02:34 PM
Final Fantasy 13 was a travesty. It was an on-the-rails adventure story with some RPG elements. And it wasn't even a good story.

Buk Was Right
06-13-2011, 02:37 PM
Wow. Man, I want your electronics. :) Every time I use my blu-ray player for netflix, I get it for 3-5 minutes and it shuts down. Usually when I run it a second time it works.

Your Blu Ray player is teaching you an important lesson about perseverance. Don't be a dick about it, just absorb the lesson.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 03:39 PM
Seriously, all games should just be Call of Duty. I mean, how much better would the Zelda franchise be if it were Call of Duty?

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 03:41 PM
Just for the record, I said Ryu was gay, I never said he likes to give head. As I have no evidence to support whether or not he does in fact give head. Therefore I can not comment on Ryu's alleged cock sucking activities.



I dunno, wouldn't those things chaff?

I'm sure there's a minority of those who don't, but in all my years of sucking dick, never have I encountered another duck sucker who didn't enjoy sucking dick.

Buk Was Right
06-13-2011, 03:55 PM
I'm sure there's a minority of those who don't, but in all my years of sucking dick, never have I encountered another duck sucker who didn't enjoy sucking dick.

Gay slang is weird.

Tyr
06-13-2011, 03:58 PM
Gay slang is weird.

Sure is, can you even suck on one of those uncooked?

Hey Bendis board, I think we just found your guys answer to lebian.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 04:05 PM
If you haven't sucked duck, why wouldn't you just murder yourself? It's like, what you do, you know? Living life to the fullest.

UltimateFactor
06-13-2011, 04:06 PM
Call Of Duty Zelda: Save The Princess Or Die Trying!

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 04:10 PM
There's no such thing as a game that wouldn't improve if it were Call of Duty.

The Hodag
06-13-2011, 04:11 PM
Whoa man, tone it down a bit. No reason to get so harsh =)

I've said before, I'm down with an FPS here and there, I just don't really get why CoD was so heavily latched onto. Campaign is nothing special, there's really no gameplay mechanics in the thing other than looking down sights and aiming for the other guy (and occasionally shaking off an attack dog) and the multi is the same thing with perks. And the game has absolutely no personality outside of Cpt. Price. Meh. Bioshock, now there's an FPS (which also happens to have terrible FPS mechanics, but makes up for it by everything else being awesome). And I'm actually looking forward to Rage now that I've seen more of it too.

I played most of the first Modern Warfare and my problems were things like "it's too frantic!" and "my AI teammates annoy me by either getting in the way of my shots or hogging the glory." The frantic thing really bugged me. I'd get to the end of a level and just feel all keyed up, not exhilarated like I want to be. So it's clearly not for me.

At the same time, I could easily see what it was so popular. It's hugely immersive and has amazing production values when it comes to graphics and sound. The moment-to-moment fighting conveys battlefield chaos at a level I've never seen before, and which impressed me even as I was thinking "this chaos is driving me insane." It had some very satisfying interstitial missions, like the bombing runs from the plane. It had several very memorable sequences, including the ghillie suit mission and, of course, the nuclear bomb explosion.

It's not for me, but the series seems to be really well done. As to "personality," I think its personality is GRIM REALISM. While the plotting gets somewhat outlandish, the combat it frames always feels very real, very unforgiving. And the vicarious thrill of experiencing modern ground combat is something that's pretty much always gonna be in style. The realism is something you can't get from Metal Gear or Bad Company.

c. page
06-13-2011, 04:15 PM
There's no such thing as a game that wouldn't improve if it were Call of Duty.

What about Call of Duty? You can't make it any more Call of Duty, so you couldn't improve it.

Brad N.
06-13-2011, 04:30 PM
Final Fantasy 13 was a travesty. It was an on-the-rails adventure story with some RPG elements. And it wasn't even a good story.

Agreed. I didn't even finish it before trading it in

Buk Was Right
06-13-2011, 04:35 PM
What about Call of Duty? You can't make it any more Call of Duty, so you couldn't improve it.

This guy could:

http://i195.photobucket.com/albums/z37/edq13/250px-Xzibit.jpg

Yo dawg we heard you liked Call of Duty so we put Call of Duty in your Call of Duty so it'd be more Call of Duty while you Call of Duty.

The Hodag
06-13-2011, 04:36 PM
Agreed. I didn't even finish it before trading it in

If I'm not mistaken, I just saw some preview on XBox for Final Fantasy 13-2.

Tyr
06-13-2011, 04:39 PM
If I'm not mistaken, I just saw some preview on XBox for Final Fantasy 13-2.

Hooray! More of the same crap we didn't ask for.

I'll come out and say this if I haven't said it on this board before. I think Bioware has gotten arrogant, and I think it's starting to effect their work.

Masculine Todd
06-13-2011, 04:58 PM
If Call of Duty was Call of Duty, it'd be so badass.

ZimMan2
06-13-2011, 05:34 PM
Cara bella, cara mia bella!
Mia bambina, o ciel!
Ché la stimo…
Ché la stimo.
O cara mia, addio!
La mia bambina cara,
perché non passi lontana?
Sì, lontana da Scïenza,
Cara, cara mia bambina?
Ah, mia bella!
Ah, mia cara!
Ah, mia cara!
Ah, mia bambina!
O cara, cara mia…



Oh, I'm sorry, were you guys talking about something?

Josh V
06-13-2011, 05:57 PM
Oh, and assassins creed is the most overrated aaa title

Brad N.
06-13-2011, 07:34 PM
Oh, and assassins creed is the most overrated aaa title

Assassins Creed I barely got past the first couple missions before giving up on it. Not for me, and I agreed. Highly overrated. However, II and Brotherhood are top notch.

bkiel
06-13-2011, 07:57 PM
Because with all their technological advantages, they still have to rip off whatever innovations Nintendo comes up with.

And yet Nintendo was the first one to have to come up with a "next gen" system.....

bkiel
06-13-2011, 08:04 PM
Wii: The console you can play with the whole family!

WiiU: The console you can play when the rest of the family gets sick of the gimmick and just wants to watch TV.

Tyr
06-13-2011, 08:05 PM
And yet Nintendo was the first one to have to come up with a "next gen" system.....

Well they stepped into the US stage when their competition had nuked each other into a smoking crater filled with ET Video Game cartridges, except for Atari who was a mere shell of itself.

Though being able to set up shop in said wasteland and thrive was quite a feat.

bkiel
06-13-2011, 08:08 PM
Well they stepped into the US stage when their competition had nuked each other into a smoking crater filled with ET Video Game cartridges, except for Atari who was a mere shell of itself.

Though being able to set up shop in said wasteland and thrive was quite a feat.

Yes it was. 25 years ago. Now, after rereleasing the Gamecube with a motion sensor, they seem content playing catch-up with everyone else.

bkiel
06-13-2011, 08:10 PM
Hooray! More of the same crap we didn't ask for.

I'll come out and say this if I haven't said it on this board before. I think Bioware has gotten arrogant, and I think it's starting to effect their work.

Their only actual miss so far is DA2. It's a pretty big miss, granted, but that's it as far as I'm concerned. ME3 doesn't come out til early next year, so no one can say anything about it yet.

Tyr
06-13-2011, 08:22 PM
Their only actual miss so far is DA2. It's a pretty big miss, granted, but that's it as far as I'm concerned. ME3 doesn't come out til early next year, so no one can say anything about it yet.

That's part of the problem bkiel, look at their track record, hit after hit after hit. Before Dragon Age II there were what two possible misses. Jade Empire for the Xbox, and Never Winter Nights. Now Never Winter Nights wasn't entirely a miss itself, but it was a disappointment when you consider what it was initially advertised as.

And none of these games were necessarily bad. They haven't had any real failures and I think that has gone to their collective heads. And were starting to see less then stellar stuff from there shop because of it, not just Dragon Age II, but some of the DLC for the original was lackluster at best, the same for Mass Effect 2's last DLC.

Hey I think Mass Effect 3 is going to be good, but there showing some kinks in there armor of late and that has me worried.

Buk Was Right
06-13-2011, 08:32 PM
You guys know that EVERY video game company's goal (from the smallest indie developer to the first party giants) is to make money, right?

They're not here to make art or make you love them or tell a story. They're here to get paid and paid well.

Say what you will about Nintendo's "STUPID" product launches that no "real gamer" really wants, but those motherfuckers could shit in a different gold toilet every day and still turn a profit.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 08:50 PM
There's no such thing as a game that wouldn't improve if it were Call of Duty.

Well I mean, Call of Duty in space. Y'know, like Halo. Ooo! Ooo! Halo of Duty! Fuck yeah, where's my check?

bkiel
06-13-2011, 08:51 PM
You guys know that EVERY video game company's goal (from the smallest indie developer to the first party giants) is to make money, right?

They're not here to make art or make you love them or tell a story. They're here to get paid and paid well.

Say what you will about Nintendo's "STUPID" product launches that no "real gamer" really wants, but those motherfuckers could shit in a different gold toilet every day and still turn a profit.

No shit. Doesn't change the fact that they're still banking on three or four franchises and whatever gimmick they came up with this year. Meanwhile, third-party support has gone down the toilet and thanks to cutting corners elsewhere, games don't look nearly as good or (except for Nintendo-developed software) play nearly as good as anything comparable on other systems.

The reason I traded in my Wii was because I realized that the next game for it that I might want was over a year down the line. And the games I had just finished were already several months old.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 08:52 PM
If you haven't sucked duck, why wouldn't you just murder yourself? It's like, what you do, you know? Living life to the fullest.

Sucking duck is pretty much where to start right? I mean, it is a pretty greasy meat...

bkiel
06-13-2011, 08:53 PM
I should clarify that I'm speaking strictly on a home console basis. The various versions of DS are fun little machines, but I don't really have the chance to play games outside of my house.

bkiel
06-13-2011, 09:31 PM
The Legend of Zelda: Yes, You Do Have to Play That Shitty Water Dungeon Again

Slewo.O
06-13-2011, 09:36 PM
The Legend of Zelda: Yes, You Do Have to Play That Shitty Water Dungeon Again

You do know they altered the item system to alleviate that right?

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 09:37 PM
So we covered "Final Fantasy games are shit" and "the Wii is for creepy people who have Mickey Mouse sheets at 35" topics already.

Ummmm...

Mass Effect 1 was way better than 2. Keep your fucking shooters out of my RPGs you mouth breathers.

bkiel
06-13-2011, 09:40 PM
So we covered "Final Fantasy games are shit" and "the Wii is for creepy people who have Mickey Mouse sheets at 35" topics already.

Ummmm...

Mass Effect 1 was way better than 2. Keep your fucking shooters out of my RPGs you mouth breathers.

ME1 was less of a shooter? What, because you had the pleasure of spending more time driving across barren wastelands? You could experience the thrill of selling off a shitload of useless gear after every mission?

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 09:47 PM
Yes, it was.

That science fact.

And ME2 has essentially meaningless items and a system even more mind numbing than driving around in a lunar lander.

Who fucking thought sending probes was fun?

bkiel
06-13-2011, 09:53 PM
Yes, it was.

That science fact.

And ME2 has essentially meaningless items and a system even more mind numbing than driving around in a lunar lander.

Who fucking thought sending probes was fun?

At least the tedious probing (heh) had an actual reason to do it, rather than "spend hours driving around lifeless planets looking for bits of crap, and we'll give you a few extra experience points if you find all of it."

And ME1 had truckloads of equipment drops that actually were meaningless, and were only there to sell so you could afford to buy good equipment from vendors.

Hate_Prime
06-13-2011, 09:55 PM
I hope EA goes bankrupt.

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 09:56 PM
That to me is a part of the fun of sandbox RPGs.

Roaming around looking for crap to do.

Could they have made it a lot better for ME2? Absolutely.

Should they have gutted it so people who have Master Chief tattoos don't complain? No.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 09:57 PM
So we covered "Final Fantasy games are shit" and "the Wii is for creepy people who have Mickey Mouse sheets at 35" topics already.

Ummmm...

Mass Effect 1 was way better than 2. Keep your fucking shooters out of my RPGs you mouth breathers.

I never got to play the first but watching my buddy play it for hours on end I don't see how that could possibly be a better game. The abilities and inventory system already looked pretty tacked on and the lunar rover thing always bored the both of us to tears. The probe thing was tedious, but you could get every mineral you'd ever need in about 20 minutes if diligent enough. I love my RPG's as much as the next guy, but playing ME2 that seems like it was how they always wanted that game to be, with the RPG stuff to be pretty much story and decision based.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 10:00 PM
I hope EA goes bankrupt.

If Old Republic fails hard, they might given the money pumped into that shit. I'd rather see Activision's offices burned to the ground first though. At least Richotello seemed somewhat interested in trying out some new IPs. But yeah, never really wish to see anyone lose their job (well, on the "ground" level anyway. I'd love to see Bobby Kotick fail miserably).

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 10:01 PM
I never got to play the first but watching my buddy play it for hours on end I don't see how that could possibly be a better game. The abilities and inventory system already looked pretty tacked on and the lunar rover thing always bored the both of us to tears. The probe thing was tedious, but you could get every mineral you'd ever need in about 20 minutes if diligent enough. I love my RPG's as much as the next guy, but playing ME2 that seems like it was how they always wanted that game to be, with the RPG stuff to be pretty much story and decision based.

Your opinions are wrong and shitty.

Jerk.

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 10:04 PM
Halo is dumb, but thats why its so popular and fun.

Its like the Dancing with the Stars of video games.

And thats not a bad thing.

Briomega
06-13-2011, 10:07 PM
Ahh Target being full of wrong again. Everything is right with the BenBo when Target's wrong.

:)

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 10:10 PM
Its the same thing they did to the Fallout franchise.

Hey lets take an RPG game, then make it an FPS and add in some RPG elements.

And make sniper rifles win the game.

Buk Was Right
06-13-2011, 10:16 PM
Ahh Target being full of wrong again. Everything is right with the BenBo when Target's wrong.

:)

No matter how out of whack the universe gets it always rights itself.

Briomega
06-13-2011, 10:17 PM
No matter how out of whack the universe gets it always rights itself.

Warms the cockles, it does.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 10:17 PM
Your opinions are wrong and shitty.

Jerk.

Whatever, you fucking love me and missed my ass.

Hate_Prime
06-13-2011, 10:19 PM
ME1 was less of a shooter? What, because you had the pleasure of spending more time driving across barren wastelands? You could experience the thrill of selling off a shitload of useless gear after every mission?

In my opinion what the first mass Effect lacked was something like this.

http://i.imgur.com/Q5qJh.jpg

A proper rpg interface and inventory screen. 90% of what you pick up in any rpg is essentially vendor trash anyway. You pick up a nice set of armor yet it's not as good as the ones you're already waring? You sell it of course. But it has to be easy to sort out and see what you have. ME1's interface made it tedious.

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 10:20 PM
I hate all of you.

Arkham Asylum wouldn't have been a hit if Batman hadn't been the main character.

Because it wasn't very good.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 10:25 PM
Ooo, here's one. GTA4 was roughly around the competent line. The "friendship" stuff was annoying as hell, the shooting (which was never a strong point to begin with) was still terribly rough, the driving mechanics were fucking horrendous as taking a turn at more than 15 MPH would cause your car to flip, and the map was way too big and unwieldy. Plus, god forbid a cop see me just draw a gun without calling in a fucking chopper on my ass. Nico being a pretty good character and an okay story were pretty much all that brought that game up to being about average. I'd rather go back and play any of the PS2 GTA's instead though.

The Human Target
06-13-2011, 10:26 PM
Thats true of all GTA games.

They have horrid controls.

Humphrey_Lee
06-13-2011, 10:34 PM
Thats true of all GTA games.

They have horrid controls.

True, but everything became even worse as the world around them became more "twitchy". And the car mechanics in those old games may also have been twitchy, but at least they didn't overturn because a civilian sneezed in their direction.

Ashwin Pande
06-13-2011, 11:31 PM
Saints Row 2 is a HELL of a lot more fun to play than GTA4.

Tyr
06-14-2011, 01:19 AM
At least the tedious probing (heh) had an actual reason to do it, rather than "spend hours driving around lifeless planets looking for bits of crap, and we'll give you a few extra experience points if you find all of it."

And ME1 had truckloads of equipment drops that actually were meaningless, and were only there to sell so you could afford to buy good equipment from vendors.

Ok show of hands, how many of you probed Uranus? *raises hand*

Now how many of you did it just to annoy Tricia Helfer? *raises hand*


I hope EA goes bankrupt.

Now that's just mean Hate, why do you hate EA so? They cleaned up there act in the last 5 or 6 years, they're not the evil empire anymore.


I hate all of you.

Arkham Asylum wouldn't have been a hit if Batman hadn't been the main character.

Because it wasn't very good.

I think someone needs a hug.....

http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs23/f/2008/007/a/5/Someone_needs_a_hug__by_jollyjack.jpg (http://jollyjack.deviantart.com/gallery/?q=someone+needs+a+hug#/d182p3s)

Hate_Prime
06-14-2011, 02:21 AM
Now that's just mean Hate, why do you hate EA so? They cleaned up there act in the last 5 or 6 years, they're not the evil empire anymore.

You asked for inflammatory.

Why do I hate them? Look at their influence on our beloved Bioware for one.

To me, this is what EA has been for a good while now:

http://i.imgur.com/HxHSW.jpg

They seem show a lack of regard for their medium and their fans. They appeal to the lowest common denominator and try to milk every last scent from us. They thought up locking content in full retail priced games to be "redeemed" for extra money after you bought it as a policy (http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/eas-project-ten-dollar-explained). From a pc gaming perspective, the games they publish feel bloated and a pain in the ass to even get going. The games themselves are usually not that great. If they were comics, they're stuck in the 90's mindset.

Of course EA's not the only company like this, but I'm harder on EA because, well, Bioware's there now and also their name, Electronic Arts, used to also be their ideal. It's like they wanted to be Martin Scorsese but turned into Michael Bay because it's more profitable.

bkiel
06-14-2011, 04:16 AM
EA published Brutal Legend after it was dropped by another publisher for not being a safe franchise. That's all I'm saying.

UltimateFactor
06-14-2011, 04:27 AM
If I'm not mistaken, I just saw some preview on XBox for Final Fantasy 13-2.

That game is gonna be awesome.

Marcdachamp
06-14-2011, 04:53 AM
Wow. Man, I want your electronics. :) Every time I use my blu-ray player for netflix, I get it for 3-5 minutes and it shuts down. Usually when I run it a second time it works.

That's awful. I would have switched to using it on the Wii or PS3 months ago if I had any issues in the slightest. Hell, I should actually disconnect my Blu-Ray player and move it to another room, but I hate to tamper with something that works so well for me. :lol:

Bill!
06-14-2011, 05:26 AM
I hate all of you.

Arkham Asylum wouldn't have been a hit if Batman hadn't been the main character.

Because it wasn't very good.

Very true. But this is the Bendis Board, lots of crappy comic book games have gotten a pass. Because they are almost all universally bad.

Masculine Todd
06-14-2011, 06:07 AM
The titular character of the beloved videogame Batman: Arkham Asylum was decidedly homosexual. I know this because he wore tight pants and exhibited no chemistry with the busty Harley Quinn. If that 'mo had been in Call of Duty, he would've been scarfing pussy like poptarts.

bkiel
06-14-2011, 07:08 AM
They seem show a lack of regard for their medium and their fans. They appeal to the lowest common denominator and try to milk every last scent from us. They thought up locking content in full retail priced games to be "redeemed" for extra money after you bought it as a policy (http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/eas-project-ten-dollar-explained). From a pc gaming perspective, the games they publish feel bloated and a pain in the ass to even get going. The games themselves are usually not that great. If they were comics, they're stuck in the 90's mindset.

Of course EA's not the only company like this, but I'm harder on EA because, well, Bioware's there now and also their name, Electronic Arts, used to also be their ideal. It's like they wanted to be Martin Scorsese but turned into Michael Bay because it's more profitable.

Within the link you posted, they state that this policy is only for used games. This is also my personal experience, as I've never had to pay extra for the content listed after buying said games new. A lot of money goes into developing, marketing, and publishing these higher-end titles. Developers and publishers would like to get paid for those efforts.

But yeah, EA is greedy because they want to get paid for their work. Granted, they've done some shady things in the past, (trying to buy tons of Rockstar stock right before GTAIV came out) but this doesn't qualify.

Humphrey_Lee
06-14-2011, 07:22 AM
The titular character of the beloved videogame Batman: Arkham Asylum was decidedly homosexual. I know this because he wore tight pants and exhibited no chemistry with the busty Harley Quinn. If that 'mo had been in Call of Duty, he would've been scarfing pussy like poptarts.

And riding a snow mobile...

Marcdachamp
06-14-2011, 07:24 AM
The titular character of the beloved videogame Batman: Arkham Asylum was decidedly homosexual. I know this because he wore tight pants and exhibited no chemistry with the busty Harley Quinn. If that 'mo had been in Call of Duty, he would've been scarfing pussy like poptarts.

"Batman's car has a moral's clause? He kept a young boy in a cave!"

Cth
06-14-2011, 08:40 AM
You guys know that EVERY video game company's goal (from the smallest indie developer to the first party giants) is to make money, right?

They're not here to make art or make you love them or tell a story. They're here to get paid and paid well.


Tell that to the guys who decided to push back the release date of Transformers Dark of the Moon because Tuesday was too crowded (Duke Nukem, Child of Eden, Alice, etc).. I mean, you move the release date to a day or two later?

Wouldn't it make sense to bump it up or even another week? One day later, most of the people with disposable income would have wasted it on the other games.

Sure, it's a movie tie-in game, which are notoriously bad, but this one was made by the guys who did WFC which was a great multiplayer game. Sucks for the people who took a day off to play it (who does that anyways? yeesh!)

bkiel
06-14-2011, 09:34 AM
And in the end it won't matter when it's released, because it's a Transformers movie game.

Brad N.
06-14-2011, 09:51 AM
Within the link you posted, they state that this policy is only for used games. This is also my personal experience, as I've never had to pay extra for the content listed after buying said games new. A lot of money goes into developing, marketing, and publishing these higher-end titles. Developers and publishers would like to get paid for those efforts.

But yeah, EA is greedy because they want to get paid for their work. Granted, they've done some shady things in the past, (trying to buy tons of Rockstar stock right before GTAIV came out) but this doesn't qualify.

Not just used games. I bought the new Tiger Woods game this year and they had 19 courses you had to pay (@300 MS points) to download and a large number of them are needed to go through career mode. In other words they made you pay anywhere from 15-25 dollars extra just to play the game completely.

bkiel
06-14-2011, 09:55 AM
Damn, I hadn't seen anything on that. Fuckers.

PatrickA
06-14-2011, 10:41 AM
Ooo, here's one. GTA4 was roughly around the competent line. The "friendship" stuff was annoying as hell, the shooting (which was never a strong point to begin with) was still terribly rough, the driving mechanics were fucking horrendous as taking a turn at more than 15 MPH would cause your car to flip, and the map was way too big and unwieldy. Plus, god forbid a cop see me just draw a gun without calling in a fucking chopper on my ass. Nico being a pretty good character and an okay story were pretty much all that brought that game up to being about average. I'd rather go back and play any of the PS2 GTA's instead though.

I agree. Further, I thought GTA4 took itself way too seriously. The previous versions (specifically Vice City and San Andreas) worked for me because they had a slightly surreal vibe to them.

Brian Defferding
06-14-2011, 10:44 AM
Starcraft is better than any Call of Duty game!

Forrest
06-14-2011, 10:53 AM
Borderlands is better than all the Call of Duty and Gears of War games combined.

Bill!
06-14-2011, 11:55 AM
Borderlands is better than all the Call of Duty and Gears of War games combined.

Borderlands was a boring bastardized version of Fallout 3. And Fallout 3 was far from perfect.

ZimMan2
06-14-2011, 01:30 PM
I actually do have something semi-relevant to say, and that is:

The idea of dividing games into genres like FPS, RPG, MMO, etc. is dumb. Films abandoned the idea of strict genre guidelines a long time ago, and filmmakers are better off for it. The progression of video games as a form of entertainment, let alone their ascension to art, depends on the willingness of developers and players alike to leave these notions behind. I understand that a lot of people have done this already, but the old mentality of "you're making X type of game, therefore you must conform to X standards" still seems to permeate gamer culture.

Tyr
06-14-2011, 01:52 PM
You asked for inflammatory.

Why do I hate them? Look at their influence on our beloved Bioware for one.

To me, this is what EA has been for a good while now:

http://i.imgur.com/HxHSW.jpg

They seem show a lack of regard for their medium and their fans. They appeal to the lowest common denominator and try to milk every last scent from us. They thought up locking content in full retail priced games to be "redeemed" for extra money after you bought it as a policy (http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/eas-project-ten-dollar-explained). From a pc gaming perspective, the games they publish feel bloated and a pain in the ass to even get going. The games themselves are usually not that great. If they were comics, they're stuck in the 90's mindset.

Of course EA's not the only company like this, but I'm harder on EA because, well, Bioware's there now and also their name, Electronic Arts, used to also be their ideal. It's like they wanted to be Martin Scorsese but turned into Michael Bay because it's more profitable.

Well Bioware did give us ps3 owners the Mass Effect franchise under their banner....

Though I think you might be giving EA to much credit for spoiling Bioware as it where, I think some of that is of Biowares own doing. And the sin to win contest, yeah that was a mistake, I think it was more a PR blunder then anything else.


The titular character of the beloved videogame Batman: Arkham Asylum was decidedly homosexual. I know this because he wore tight pants and exhibited no chemistry with the busty Harley Quinn. If that 'mo had been in Call of Duty, he would've been scarfing pussy like poptarts.

Gay Batman jokes? Seriously? Whats next, Gay Superman jokes? Gonna make cracks about how he's off to gay city?

Besides.....

http://playstationlifestyle.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Batman-Arkham-City-feature.jpg

capntightpants
06-14-2011, 02:00 PM
Gay Batman jokes? Seriously? Whats next, Gay Superman jokes? Gonna make cracks about how he's off to gay city?

Besides.....

http://playstationlifestyle.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/Batman-Arkham-City-feature.jpg


Hey man, stop being so gay.

Bill!
06-14-2011, 02:37 PM
Here's something inflammatory, if you don't get the MGS storyline, you are terrible.

If you don't like MGS because of the cinemas, get over it. It has better gameplay in five minutes than most games do in 10 hours. Plus, it still packs in a good 10-20 hours of gameplay even with the cinematics.

MGS is meant to be a cinematic epic experience. If you don't want a big over the top storyline with great characters, then go play Pokemon or something equally as blah. I love the stories, and the cinemas add to that experience. I'd rather watch a beautifully designed and choreographed cinema than read a text file that's two pages long describing the story.

Bill!
06-14-2011, 02:38 PM
If all you play is hyper realistic games (meaning, no science fiction at all), then get yourself a fucking imagination.

Tyr
06-14-2011, 02:38 PM
All I'm sayin is with Batman's got the dating Catwoman (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DatingCatwoman) thing going. Ryu doesn't.... No chemistry at all.

Not sayin that Ryu needs it for as this song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j4t185wl-0) goes...

I started this thread, I can gay it up if I want to, dammit!

Bill!
06-14-2011, 02:40 PM
Mortal Kombat is and has always been terrible.

Bill!
06-14-2011, 02:42 PM
If you don't own all the major consoles of the generation, and play a variety of games on each, then don't call yourself a gamer or video game enthusiast.

You should appreciate the benefits of each system, and also recognize each ones shortcomings.

You should also realize that each system has plenty of amazing games to make it worth the purchase.

ZimMan2
06-14-2011, 03:02 PM
If you don't own all the major consoles of the generation, and play a variety of games on each, then don't call yourself a gamer or video game enthusiast.

You should appreciate the benefits of each system, and also recognize each ones shortcomings.

You should also realize that each system has plenty of amazing games to make it worth the purchase.

And if I do realize these things but am just too poor to afford all the consoles and games?

Masculine Todd
06-14-2011, 03:02 PM
Tyr's only asexual 'cause that dude ain't got no cock yet like notable homosexual characters Batman and Ryu and people who wear tight pants. u gay dawg aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

Masculine Todd
06-14-2011, 03:04 PM
If all you play is hyper realistic games (meaning, no science fiction at all), then get yourself a fucking imagination.


If you don't own all the major consoles of the generation, and play a variety of games on each, then don't call yourself a gamer or video game enthusiast.

You should appreciate the benefits of each system, and also recognize each ones shortcomings.

You should also realize that each system has plenty of amazing games to make it worth the purchase.

This is some OP tire posting right here.

Buk Was Right
06-14-2011, 03:05 PM
If you haven't done everything ever then you can't have an opinion about anything!

Ashwin Pande
06-14-2011, 03:05 PM
I actually do have something semi-relevant to say, and that is:

The idea of dividing games into genres like FPS, RPG, MMO, etc. is dumb. Films abandoned the idea of strict genre guidelines a long time ago, and filmmakers are better off for it. The progression of video games as a form of entertainment, let alone their ascension to art, depends on the willingness of developers and players alike to leave these notions behind. I understand that a lot of people have done this already, but the old mentality of "you're making X type of game, therefore you must conform to X standards" still seems to permeate gamer culture.

What?

This is just... what?

Are you high?

Tyr
06-14-2011, 03:05 PM
Tyr's only asexual 'cause that dude ain't got no cock yet like notable homosexual characters Batman and Ryu and people who wear tight pants. u gay dawg aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

Believe whatever you want.

Masculine Todd
06-14-2011, 03:14 PM
Bendis Board poster Tyre: y u tellin mee what to do, dawg?

Briomega
06-14-2011, 03:21 PM
If you haven't done everything ever then you can't have an opinion about anything!

Rawrrr

ZimMan2
06-14-2011, 03:21 PM
What?

This is just... what?

Are you high?

I fail to see what's hard to understand.

Bill!
06-14-2011, 04:24 PM
If you haven't done everything ever then you can't have an opinion about anything!

Exactamundo.

The Human Target
06-14-2011, 04:35 PM
If you haven't done everything ever then you can't have an opinion about anything!

I buy all comics every month in order to have an opinion about any of them.

I also buy all cds.

And watch all tv shows.

And fuck all hookers. (boy and girl)

bkiel
06-14-2011, 04:37 PM
If you haven't done everything ever then you can't have an opinion about anything!

If you've never done a Hot Carl with a woman, you can't say it's disgusting!

Buk Was Right
06-14-2011, 04:40 PM
If you've never done a Hot Carl with a woman, you can't say it's disgusting!

What if I've done a Hot Carl WITH Carl?

Briomega
06-14-2011, 04:43 PM
That game everybody loves? Well I hate it because I suck at it and can't admit it so it must be a shitty game and everyone else is wrong.

Buk Was Right
06-14-2011, 04:47 PM
The game that everybody loves and is nearly universally critically acclaimed? Well I hate it because I NEED people to argue with me and dislike me. I FUCKING NEED IT LIKE I NEED AIR!

Slewo.O
06-14-2011, 04:48 PM
Here's something inflammatory, if you don't get the MGS storyline, you are terrible.

If you don't like MGS because of the cinemas, get over it. It has better gameplay in five minutes than most games do in 10 hours. Plus, it still packs in a good 10-20 hours of gameplay even with the cinematics.

MGS is meant to be a cinematic epic experience. If you don't want a big over the top storyline with great characters, then go play Pokemon or something equally as blah. I love the stories, and the cinemas add to that experience. I'd rather watch a beautifully designed and choreographed cinema than read a text file that's two pages long describing the story.

You don't need to knock Pokemon just to elevate MGS Bill...

Briomega
06-14-2011, 04:49 PM
Graphics!

Story!

Rawrrr!

The Human Target
06-14-2011, 04:51 PM
The Super Smash Bros. games are all horribly balanced button mashing messes.

And yet I've still had fun playing them.

Kirby FTW.

Hate_Prime
06-14-2011, 06:15 PM
Those who knock Pokemon do so primarily for it's cutesy aesthetic and largely ignorant of the fact that there is a rather deep strategy element underneath that can be quite addictive to stat counting, min-maxing, strategy gamers.

Personally, I'm not a fan but only because I don't care enough to put the effort to get good at a game that's not really my thing (and on handhelds, no less). I could say the same for Starcraft and it's ilk, but I can appreciate that they're good games.

Still, fuck the cartoon.

The Human Target
06-14-2011, 07:23 PM
To be fair, the Pokemon games have horrible, mind numbing stories.

But then, they are for 9 year olds.

Humphrey_Lee
06-14-2011, 08:28 PM
Y'know what I love about this thread? It's that it's obvious we're all trying real hard to run some shit on stuff, but other than my jabbering about Gears and CoD a little, Brad running some jing on Nintendo in general, and Ben being wrong about ME and Arkham Asylum, we're not coming up with much. I think we've been overall spoiled by games in recent years with there being so much good stuff that no one really plays the shit that probably deserves a good badmouthing.

Buk Was Right
06-14-2011, 08:33 PM
Y'know what I love about this thread? It's that it's obvious we're all trying real hard to run some shit on stuff, but other than my jabbering about Gears and CoD a little, Brad running some jing on Nintendo in general, and Ben being wrong about ME and Arkham Asylum, we're not coming up with much. I think we've been overall spoiled by games in recent years with there being so much good stuff that no one really plays the shit that probably deserves a good badmouthing.

Humphrey drops the shakkaBOOM!

Everything is amazing and yet somehow everything is terrible. HOW CAN THAT BE!?!?

Masculine Todd
06-14-2011, 08:55 PM
I like the phrase "running some shit."

Humphrey_Lee
06-14-2011, 09:10 PM
Humphrey drops the shakkaBOOM!

Everything is amazing and yet somehow everything is terrible. HOW CAN THAT BE!?!?

It's like a bit an extremely hilarious comedian would run with for a dozen minutes or so...

Cth
06-14-2011, 09:18 PM
And in the end it won't matter when it's released, because it's a Transformers movie game.

Honestly it's better than most of the posted in here.

Better multiplayer than MW even but that bar isn't set high.

Cth
06-14-2011, 09:20 PM
I actually do have something semi-relevant to say, and that is:

The idea of dividing games into genres like FPS, RPG, MMO, etc. is dumb. Films abandoned the idea of strict genre guidelines a long time ago, and filmmakers are better off for it. The progression of video games as a form of entertainment, let alone their ascension to art, depends on the willingness of developers and players alike to leave these notions behind. I understand that a lot of people have done this already, but the old mentality of "you're making X type of game, therefore you must conform to X standards" still seems to permeate gamer culture.

Also, most fans are clueless about what an RPG is.

They define it so loosely that ALL games are RPGs.

Cth
06-14-2011, 09:22 PM
Here's something inflammatory, if you don't get the MGS storyline, you are terrible.

If you don't like MGS because of the cinemas, get over it. It has better gameplay in five minutes than most games do in 10 hours. Plus, it still packs in a good 10-20 hours of gameplay even with the cinematics.

MGS is meant to be a cinematic epic experience. If you don't want a big over the top storyline with great characters, then go play Pokemon or something equally as blah. I love the stories, and the cinemas add to that experience. I'd rather watch a beautifully designed and choreographed cinema than read a text file that's two pages long describing the story.

MSG 4 was the best film I watched last year.

That egg scene? Sheer brilliance!

Brad N.
06-15-2011, 04:55 AM
Honestly it's better than most of the posted in here.

Better multiplayer than MW even but that bar isn't set high.

And I got shit for making fun of adults who play toddler games like Pokemon. I'll give you WFC was much better than expected, but Transformers movie games are piles of shit.

Marcdachamp
06-15-2011, 05:13 AM
To be fair, the Pokemon games have horrible, mind numbing stories.

Mostly. But I will say this: Black and White had the best story out of any of them, and it really showed a lot of polish the last couple games lacked.

stevapalooza
06-15-2011, 07:19 AM
-Knock knock

-Who's there?

-Metal Gear Solid's storyline.

-Metal Gear Solid's storyline who?

-The story is set in 2005, six years after the events of Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake. A genetically enhanced next-generation special forces unit commanded by FOXHOUND leads an armed uprising on a remote island in Alaska's Fox Archipelago. This island, codenamed Shadow Moses, is the site of a nuclear weapons disposal facility. The forces that seized this island have acquired the nuclear-capable mecha Metal Gear REX, and are threatening the U.S government with a nuclear reprisal if they do not receive the remains of the "legendary mercenary" Big Boss within 24 hours. Solid Snake is forced out of retirement and is dispatched at the request of Colonel Roy Campbell to penetrate the terrorists' defenses and neutralize the threat. Snake is also ordered to locate hostages DARPA Chief Donald Anderson, and ArmsTech president Kenneth Baker. Colonel Campbell's daughter, at the time believed to be niece, Meryl Silverburgh, is also held captive in the facility after refusing to take part in the uprising. Snake enters the facility via an air vent and eventually locates the DARPA Chief in a cell. He informs Snake of the new Metal Gear REX unit housed at the facility and how he can prevent it from being launched using a secret detonation override code, but then suddenly dies of what appears to be a heart attack. Meryl, who is held in adjoining cell, manages to break out and assists Snake in his escape as enemy soldiers are alerted to his presence. Snake then finds the other hostage, Kenneth Baker. Whilst attempting to free Baker, Snake is confronted by Revolver Ocelot who challenges Snake to a gunfight, which is interrupted by a mysterious cyborg ninja who cuts off Ocelot's right hand. Baker briefs Snake on the Metal Gear project and advises him to contact Meryl, whom he gave a PAL card that could be used to prevent the launch, but like the DARPA Chief, he suddenly dies of what appears to be a heart attack. Snake then contacts Meryl via codec, and agrees to meet her in the base's warhead disposal area on the condition that he contacts Metal Gear's designer, Dr. Hal "Otacon" Emmerich. As he emerges onto a canyon, Snake receives an anonymous codec call. The mysterious voice calls himself "Deepthroat" and warns Snake of an Tank ambush up ahead. Snake is confronted by Vulcan Raven in an M1 tank, but manages to defeat the two gunners and proceeds to the warhead disposal area. Snake locates Otacon in his lab. The ninja reappears, and Snake realizes that it is actually his former ally Gray Fox, whom he believed was killed years earlier. Otacon agrees to aid Snake remotely, using special camouflage to procure information and supplies while he remains invisible. Snake meets with Meryl and agrees for her to accompany him on his mission. Meryl gives Snake the PAL card Baker gave to her and as they head for the underground base, Meryl becomes possessed by Psycho Mantis's mind control tune and pulls her gun on Snake. Snake disarms Meryl and defeats Psycho Mantis who, before he dies, informs Snake that he read Meryl's mind, and discovered that he has "a large place" in her heart. After they reach the underground passageway, Sniper Wolf ambushes them, wounds Meryl, and after a brief duel captures Snake. While Snake is imprisoned, Liquid confirms Snake's suspicion that they are twin brothers. Snake is then tortured by Ocelot and the player can choose whether or not to give in to the torture. When Snake is taken to his cell, he discovers the body of DARPA Chief Donald Anderson lying in the corner; however, though it was only hours before Snake watched Anderson die in front of him, the body has been decomposing as if he were dead for days. The body also appears to have been drained of its blood. Eventually Snake is able to escape by fooling the guard (by either lying in ketchup or hiding under a bed) or by waiting for the Ninja to come break him out. As Snake makes his way up the facility's communications tower, he is ambushed by Liquid in an attack helicopter, but swiftly defeats him. As he emerges from the tower onto the snowfield he is confronted once again by Sniper Wolf. This time however, Snake defeats and kills Wolf in front of a grief stricken Otacon, who was infatuated with her. Nonetheless, Otacon continues to aid Snake. Snake continues on to REX's hangar, while Vulcan Raven lies in wait. Raven, having shamanistic intuition, is able to discern Snake's heritage. He can also tell that Snake is a clone, saying that he is "from another world." Snake and Raven battle it out in a freezer warehouse, which results in Raven's death. During his death scene, Raven tells Snake that the man he saw die in front of his eyes was not the DARPA Chief but Decoy Octopus, a member of FOXHOUND. He also leaves Snake with a cryptic message of his violent future. His body is then completely devoured by ravens. Infiltrating Metal Gear's hangar, Snake overhears Liquid and Ocelot preparing the launch sequence for Metal Gear REX. Thinking he is deactivating it by using the PAL card, Snake activates Metal Gear REX. Master Miller then reveals himself to be Liquid in disguise. He informs Snake that his entire mission was manipulated by the renegades to allow the launch of the nuclear weapon.Liquid explains that they are the product of the Les Enfants Terribles project, a government sponsored effort to clone Big Boss, that was conducted during the 1970s. Liquid explains that Snake received all of Big Boss' dominant genes, while he received all of the recessive genes. He also reveals to Snake the government's true reason for sending him in: the reprogrammed FoxDie virus would kill all the members of FOXHOUND, allowing the government to retrieve REX undamaged. Liquid assumes control of Metal Gear REX and a battle ensues. Gray Fox suddenly appears and destroys REX's radome and dies trying to fend off the bipedal tank from Snake. Snake destroys Metal Gear REX and is challenged again by Liquid in person. He fights Liquid atop REX and defeats him after knocking him over the edge. He is then reunited with Meryl or Otacon, depending on the player's actions. They escape through an underground tunnel, while being chased by Liquid, in a jeep. After the two vehicles crash at the tunnel entrance, Liquid emerges and pulls a gun on Snake but suddenly dies from the FoxDie virus. Colonel Campbell, briefly ousted from command of the mission, calls off a nuclear air strike intended to obliterate the evidence of the day's events and officially declares Snake killed in action to stop the US government's search for him in the future. After the end credits, the player finds out that Snake is the one with recessive genes whilst Liquid had the dominant genes. Solid Snake is revealed to have an indeterminate amount of time left before FoxDie kills him. Ocelot is revealed to be a double agent for the President of the United States. His intention was to obtain Baker's disk containing Metal Gear's specifications and deliver it to the President, and kill whoever knew of his true motives, one reason for his "accidental" killing of the DARPA Chief.

-LOL!

Kevin T Brown
06-15-2011, 07:29 AM
I buy all comics every month in order to have an opinion about any of them.

I also buy all cds.

And watch all tv shows.

And fuck all hookers. (boy and girl)

Dad?

bkiel
06-15-2011, 07:32 AM
I'm enjoying the fact that Duke Nukem Forever is getting panned to hell by every reviewer who isn't just a glorified blogger.

UltimateFactor
06-15-2011, 08:53 AM
I actually do have something semi-relevant to say, and that is:

The idea of dividing games into genres like FPS, RPG, MMO, etc. is dumb. Films abandoned the idea of strict genre guidelines a long time ago, and filmmakers are better off for it. The progression of video games as a form of entertainment, let alone their ascension to art, depends on the willingness of developers and players alike to leave these notions behind. I understand that a lot of people have done this already, but the old mentality of "you're making X type of game, therefore you must conform to X standards" still seems to permeate gamer culture.

And in other news, Madden 14 will have John Cena on the cover! EA Sports and THQ have decided to eradicate the line between genres and give us our first Football Wrestling game, and no we're not talking the XFL here folks! It's Sports Entertainment at it's best!

ZimMan2
06-15-2011, 09:48 AM
And in other news, Madden 14 will have John Cena on the cover! EA Sports and THQ have decided to eradicate the line between genres and give us our first Football Wrestling game, and no we're not talking the XFL here folks! It's Sports Entertainment at it's best!

My point is not that every game needs to do this, but people need to accept it when a game does.

Of course, I'm not in tune with anything sports related, so perhaps you actually WANT this? Because it certainly sounds a lot more interesting than any sports game that's come before.

Buk Was Right
06-15-2011, 09:55 AM
And in other news, Madden 14 will have John Cena on the cover! EA Sports and THQ have decided to eradicate the line between genres and give us our first Football Wrestling game, and no we're not talking the XFL here folks! It's Sports Entertainment at it's best!

Madden 14 is such bullshit. The patriots have WAY too many snipers and it totally unbalances the game.

Tyr
06-15-2011, 04:20 PM
I'm enjoying the fact that Duke Nukem Forever is getting panned to hell by every reviewer who isn't just a glorified blogger.

It's getting torn to shreds, I feel sorry for Randy Pitchford, this could be a huge blow to his career.

Forrest
06-15-2011, 04:22 PM
Dante [Devil May Cry] is sooooo gay. He loves the cock in and around his mouth.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 05:35 PM
It's getting torn to shreds, I feel sorry for Randy Pitchford, this could be a huge blow to his career.

:mistrust: Unless Borderlands 2 is a total piece of shit, this won't even be a blip on the radar. This wasn't their game. They took it over to help get it finished and actually in peoples hands after all these years of setbacks.

Slewo.O
06-15-2011, 05:35 PM
Dante [Devil May Cry] is sooooo gay. He loves the cock in and around his mouth.

:mistrust:

I hope you're talking about reboot Dante.

ZimMan2
06-15-2011, 07:07 PM
I'm enjoying the fact that Duke Nukem Forever is getting panned to hell by every reviewer who isn't just a glorified blogger.

Wait, you mean to tell me there are reviewers who AREN'T just glorified bloggers?

Humphrey_Lee
06-15-2011, 07:32 PM
It's getting torn to shreds, I feel sorry for Randy Pitchford, this could be a huge blow to his career.

Honestly, I still want to play that game even now, and I knew before the reviews it would be a C at the most. Point was they got it out. Guarantee if it hits, say, 400K in sales they'll make a full on modern take with assets to match. This thing was more piecemeal than Frankenstein's monster, but they can revamp the game and character. Just got to work with today's action trappings. Instead of playing Duke off as king badass of musclebound 80's analogs, you play him up as a man in a world that's forgotten how to kick ass - a Demolition Man style as Vinnie on Giant Bomb put it. In a world where Harry Potter and Twilight are big summer blockbusters, I think you can find some material to work with. And mock so the corridor military shooters and dude bro stuff while you're at it. It could work. I mean, the Expendables just made a pretty good chunk of change being that, but WAY serious...

bkiel
06-15-2011, 07:40 PM
No, the point is not that they finally got Duke Nukem out. The point is, they took a franchise that was dead, no one was still clamoring for, and wasted time and resources half-assing it just to say "Hey we did it! Yay for us!" They could have put that kind of thought into it to begin with and at the very least made it LOOK like a current gen game.

Or they could have spent time and money on their own thing and something that they cared enough to put some effort into.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 07:43 PM
Basically, the developer that took it over just made themselves part of the joke that is Duke Nukem Forever.

Humphrey_Lee
06-15-2011, 08:09 PM
No, the point is not that they finally got Duke Nukem out. The point is, they took a franchise that was dead, no one was still clamoring for, and wasted time and resources half-assing it just to say "Hey we did it! Yay for us!" They could have put that kind of thought into it to begin with and at the very least made it LOOK like a current gen game.

Or they could have spent time and money on their own thing and something that they cared enough to put some effort into.

I doubt anyone that wasn't an intern was even put on the thing. They wanted to be the ones to put it out, sure, but I'm pretty confident the Gearbox studio has more important things to be working on with their dedicated resources, like Borderlands 2. No reason to polish the turd more than you have to given the whole point of buying it in the first place, which is to see how many people will show up for Nostalgias sake to buy it and if that can be translated into a real project down the road. Thing literally had something like four different studios worth of code in it, no one was going to make that into anything.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 08:11 PM
I doubt anyone that wasn't an intern was even put on the thing. They wanted to be the ones to put it out, sure, but I'm pretty confident the Gearbox studio has more important things to be working on with their dedicated resources, like Borderlands 2. No reason to polish the turd more than you have to given the whole point of buying it in the first place, which is to see how many people will show up for Nostalgias sake to buy it and if that can be translated into a real project down the road. Thing literally had something like four different studios worth of code in it, no one was going to make that into anything.

Or they could have spent time and money on their own thing and something that they cared enough to put some effort into.

Buk Was Right
06-15-2011, 08:11 PM
Wait, you mean to tell me there are reviewers who AREN'T just glorified bloggers?

S'cool, apparently they won't get review copies of the next game.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 08:14 PM
Or they could have spent time and money on their own thing and something that they cared enough to put some effort into.

One day you might learn how a Developer works.

Buk Was Right
06-15-2011, 08:19 PM
One day you might learn how a Developer works.

What? You make beautiful art on your own terms and then someone gives you big money for it, right?

bkiel
06-15-2011, 08:20 PM
One day you might learn how a Developer works.

Yeah I know they don't always get to do that.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 08:24 PM
Point is, someone decided to pay money for the rights, and pay someone to actually get the game to ship. They could at least try to make it look like something that didn't come out on PS2.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 08:25 PM
Yeah I know they don't always get to do that.

It's not even that. I can tell you from being in their offices many, many times that they work on multiple projects at any one time. And the most important ones get the most resources and time. This was not the most important game they were working on. Probably not even the 2nd most important one.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 08:27 PM
Point is, someone decided to pay money for the rights, and pay someone to actually get the game to ship. They could at least try to make it look like something that didn't come out on PS2.

They weren't going to start over from scratch. Now THAT would have been stupid. :lol:

Cth
06-15-2011, 08:44 PM
And I got shit for making fun of adults who play toddler games like Pokemon. I'll give you WFC was much better than expected, but Transformers movie games are piles of shit.

Of course they are.

But this one is made by the WFC guys with the same engine.

I hear the Cap game has Nazis ;)

Tyr
06-15-2011, 09:09 PM
Dante [Devil May Cry] is sooooo gay. He loves the cock in and around his mouth.

You're just saying that to get Whip all riled up so that she'll post again. In which case I approve, a post by Whip is long overdue. Or should that be a Whipping post, nah, I hate puns.


:mistrust: Unless Borderlands 2 is a total piece of shit, this won't even be a blip on the radar. This wasn't their game. They took it over to help get it finished and actually in peoples hands after all these years of setbacks.

Pitchford bought it, he fully backed it and supported it, and become synonymous as the guy who brought back Duke. Sometimes all you need is one colossal failure. Just look at what happened to Gunpei Yokoi. True the game was almost complete when they bought the code, so it might not hurt him that badly.

Personally I think Duke Nukem should have stayed in the 90's where he belonged. And I hope this convinces everyone to stop trying to bring him back.


Wait, you mean to tell me there are reviewers who AREN'T just glorified bloggers?

Quoted for truth, most reviewers these days are bloggers and other such dedicated fans that eventually got paid to do what they do.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 09:12 PM
You just saying that to get Whip all riled up so that she'll post again. In which case I approve, a post by Whip is long overdue. Or should that be a Whipping post, nah, I hate puns.

Pitchford bought it, he fully backed it and supported it, and become synonymous as the guy who brought back Duke. Sometimes all you need is one colossal failure. Just look at what happened to Gunpei Yokoi. True the game was almost complete when they bought the code, so it might not hurt him that badly.

Personally I think Duke Nukem should have stayed in the 90's where he belonged.

Quoted for truth, most reviewers these days are bloggers and other such dedicated fans that eventually got paid to do what they do.

Except it is not his game and it sucking won't have even an iota of an effect. People who even know who the fuck he is know the truth.

Tyr
06-15-2011, 09:17 PM
Except it is not his game and it sucking won't have even an iota of an effect. People who even know who the fuck he is know the truth.

Maybe, but when your as excited as he was to bring Duke back, and you go to interview after interview talking about how awesome the game is going to be. Your putting your rep on the line. When a game bombs this badly as this one did, there's chance people aren't going to take him seriously for awhile. Granted I don't think Gearbox will suffer to badly because of this, but Pitchford might have a bumpy ride for awhile.

Buk Was Right
06-15-2011, 09:20 PM
Except it is not his game and it sucking won't have even an iota of an effect. People who even know who the fuck he is know the truth.

I know who he is and I had no idea he was at all in involved with Duke Nukem. I haven't been slavishly following the saga of Duke Nukem or anything, but I SORT of pay attention to industry news.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 09:22 PM
Maybe, but when your as excited as he was to bring Duke back, and you go to interview after interview talking about how awesome the game is going to be. Your putting your rep on the line. When a game bombs this badly as this one did, there's chance people aren't going to take him seriously for awhile. Granted I don't think Gearbox will suffer to badly because of this, but Pitchford might have a bumpy ride for awhile.

That's what Randy does. He's very passionate. Again, people who actually know who he is know that and won't fault him for it. The point was to get this game that so many people wanted, for whatever reason as Duke was always a piece of shit, published finally. He did that.

Brad N.
06-15-2011, 09:24 PM
Of course they are.

But this one is made by the WFC guys with the same engine.

I hear the Cap game has Nazis ;)

I'll still wait for the reviews. On both of them.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 09:29 PM
That's what Randy does. He's very passionate. Again, people who actually know who he is know that and won't fault him for it. The point was to get this game that so many kids from 14 years ago wanted, for whatever reason as Duke was always a piece of shit, published finally. He did that.

Fixed. I'm just hoping those same kids grew up enough to realize what crap those games were.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 09:35 PM
I'll still wait for the reviews. On both of them.

Two decent reviews so far.

http://www.metacritic.com/game/playstation-3/transformers-dark-of-the-moon

Briomega
06-15-2011, 09:35 PM
Fixed. I'm just hoping those same kids grew up enough to realize what crap those games were.

I don't get it. I didn't then either. The side scroller was awesome but the shooter was such garbage and the stripper bullshit that everyone salivated over was ridiculous.

bkiel
06-15-2011, 09:39 PM
I don't get it. I didn't then either. The side scroller was awesome but the shooter was such garbage and the stripper bullshit that everyone salivated over was ridiculous.

But...you could give them money and they would flash you! So what if all you saw was a pixelated amorphous blob!

Briomega
06-15-2011, 09:46 PM
But...you could give them money and they would flash you! So what if all you saw was a pixelated amorphous blob!

Granted, back then it took us like 40 minutes to download a single porn photo but still...

Buk Was Right
06-15-2011, 09:47 PM
I don't get it. I didn't then either. The side scroller was awesome but the shooter was such garbage and the stripper bullshit that everyone salivated over was ridiculous.

But they were BOOBS! BOOBS made out of pixels!

Chacalo
06-15-2011, 09:57 PM
Dante [Devil May Cry] is sooooo gay. He loves the cock in and around his mouth.

And DMC reboot Dante turning out this punchable was just par for the course for the franchise and it went over the heads of everybody being in uproar about it.

Briomega
06-15-2011, 10:01 PM
But they were BOOBS! BOOBS made out of pixels!

I made sexier pictures using my Apple IIc.

Hate_Prime
06-15-2011, 10:18 PM
Duke Nukem 3D was a tongue in cheek spoof of the bad ass manly man hero archetype that funilly enough is played so straight and lauded today with the likes of Kratos. The game was notorious for the strippers, but was innovative for huge interactive levels that begs to be explored; it wasn't your simple "corridor shooter". Think of when this came out, when everyone else was doing generic space marine super generic fpses (sound familiar?); Duke was a breath of fresh air. Then everything was overshadowed by a little game called Half Life when it came out a couple years later which was innovative and subversive in a different way.

Hate_Prime
06-15-2011, 10:22 PM
Duke needs a proper come back. Or better yet, Cate Archer with Duke Nukem-like level design.

Chacalo
06-15-2011, 10:25 PM
Kratos oh my Kratos, one thing those games are lacking is the option to control a Greek hooker so you can castrate him with the right input.

Tyr
06-15-2011, 11:53 PM
I think part of Duke Nukem's problem is one of relevancy. His last game was 14 years ago, most of his those who remember him were in the teens and early twenties back then, and are now in or approaching there 30's. Lets face it, what you thought was funny 10 years ago may not be all that funny to you now. I use to think Wren and Stimpy cartoons were funny, but looking at them now, well, they're pretty stupid.

Secondly its a case of technology. Back in the mid to late 90's we were just getting in to having full speech in games. Or at least speech beyond "Halt Schtoop! Argh!" back then audio files for speech were thought to be huge. Most games that had full on speech were regulated to adventure games on CD ROM. So having action games with characters like Lara Croft, or Duke Nukem, or Kyle Katarn who could talk and have some personality was refreshing change of pace. Even if, as in Duke case, all the character did was make crass jokes and spout one liners from action movies.

Nowadays Audio files and speech work is nothing when it comes the memory department, and devs hire on professional studios and voice actors to do the voice work. Duke Nukem has now gotta compete with the likes of Commander Shepard and Nathan Drake, characters that are fully voiced and realized.


Duke needs a proper come back. Or better yet, Cate Archer with Duke Nukem-like level design.

Yeah if there is one thing I missed about Duke Nukem 3d it was the level design, full of secret rooms and stuff. They just don't make levels with that Doom like feeling anymore.

PatrickA
06-16-2011, 03:23 AM
I made sexier pictures using my Apple IIc.

Color= 35
Plot (12, 34)
plot (43, 21)
PLot (12,35)


fap,fap,fap

Akira
06-16-2011, 03:39 AM
Honestly, I still want to play that game even now, and I knew before the reviews it would be a C at the most. Point was they got it out. Guarantee if it hits, say, 400K in sales they'll make a full on modern take with assets to match. This thing was more piecemeal than Frankenstein's monster, but they can revamp the game and character. Just got to work with today's action trappings. Instead of playing Duke off as king badass of musclebound 80's analogs, you play him up as a man in a world that's forgotten how to kick ass - a Demolition Man style as Vinnie on Giant Bomb put it. In a world where Harry Potter and Twilight are big summer blockbusters, I think you can find some material to work with. And mock so the corridor military shooters and dude bro stuff while you're at it. It could work. I mean, the Expendables just made a pretty good chunk of change being that, but WAY serious...

If this one didn't effectively kill the brand, I'd be inclined to agree; and I'm sure that was their long term goal. Unfortunately, no one is gonna give another Duke game the time of day after this one. They would've been better off just keeping the name and starting from scratch.

Sent from my Droid Incredible using Jinxworld

Akira
06-16-2011, 03:40 AM
They weren't going to start over from scratch. Now THAT would have been stupid. :lol:

Oops...

Sent from my Droid Incredible using Jinxworld

Tyr
06-25-2011, 01:39 PM
Screw the old Republic MMO, I just want more of those CG trailers. I hope this game never comes out and they just keep cranking out trailers.