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View Full Version : So there's this joke...



Kedd
11-17-2010, 12:46 PM
And I've been holding onto this joke for the better part of 15 years, just aching for a chance to use it. Every conversation of my life revolves around maneuvering the other person into setting up this joke for me. And every conversation of the past 15 years has refused to lead to the set up. i share with you now, the set up and the joke:

The Set up:
Do you know what my (father/mather/famous person/mentor) would say if he/she were alive right now?


The Joke:
"Help! Help! Get me out of this casket!" ?

Jason California
11-17-2010, 12:48 PM
I wish you the best of luck in getting that out in a live conversation.

Kedd
11-17-2010, 12:50 PM
I wish you the best of luck in getting that out in a live conversation.

It's going to happen one day...i fully expect to get no laughs and I will gladly endure the disgusted looks of the other person.

The Dean
11-17-2010, 12:53 PM
It's like it came from a candy wrapper, like Laughy Taffy or Bazooka Bubble Gum.

Kedd
11-17-2010, 12:54 PM
It's like it came from a candy wrapper, like Laughy Taffy or Bazooka Bubble Gum.

I think I got it from Spider-Man 2099 #1. So blame Peter David. Though I think I might have heard before then.

Doug
11-17-2010, 12:58 PM
I think I got it from Spider-Man 2099 #1. So blame Peter David. Though I think I might have heard before then.

I blame Peter David for lots of things.

One of which is getting me back into comics after years of not reading them.

: shakes fist at Peter David :

Ryan Elliott
11-17-2010, 12:58 PM
Heh.

bartleby
11-17-2010, 01:00 PM
But why would somebody bury your father/mother/famous person/mentor if he/she were still alive?

The Dean
11-17-2010, 01:01 PM
You need some sort of gag so people know the joke is over and it's time to laugh. Try saying, "Waka waka!"

russw
11-17-2010, 01:08 PM
I know I have heard that joke before. either from someone I knew or from a movie/tv show. The image in my mind is of someone making scratching motions with the hands after the setup

LordKinbote
11-17-2010, 01:17 PM
Is it wrong for me to hope that when you do finally get the chance to use it, it will turn out that the father/mother/famous person/mentor was actually cremated?

Fourthman
11-17-2010, 01:23 PM
That's not a joke you've been carrying around for the last 15 years; it's a brain tumor.

Kedd
11-17-2010, 01:29 PM
You need some sort of gag so people know the joke is over and it's time to laugh. Try saying, "Waka waka!"


I know I have heard that joke before. either from someone I knew or from a movie/tv show. The image in my mind is of someone making scratching motions with the hands after the setup
I kind of think delivering it dead pan is the way to go. However, should an awkward pause happen...I think it work to repeat the punch line while clawing at the air.


Is it wrong for me to hope that when you do finally get the chance to use it, it will turn out that the father/mother/famous person/mentor was actually cremated?
I'll need to find a work around for that.


That's not a joke you've been carrying around for the last 15 years; it's a brain tumor.
:panic:

Ryan Elliott
11-17-2010, 01:34 PM
:panic:


It's funnier that you messed up that smiley.

MayorMitch100
11-17-2010, 01:51 PM
Kedd, that joke will kill.

Literally. Someone will hear it and kill themselves because it so unfunny.

NeverWanderer
11-17-2010, 01:54 PM
I think I got it from Spider-Man 2099 #1. So blame Peter David.

:rofl:

The minute I read the joke, I was like, "THAT'S MIGUEL'S JOKE!!!"

Sheldo
11-17-2010, 01:56 PM
The place I know this joke from is the movie UHF

Kedd
11-17-2010, 02:05 PM
It's funnier that you messed up that smiley.



Dammit!!:-x

Kedd
11-17-2010, 02:07 PM
Kedd, that joke will kill.

Literally. Someone will hear it and kill themselves because it so unfunny.
So black guys can't be funny? Jeez, Mitch. Just...I can't believe how low you go sometimes.


:rofl:

The minute I read the joke, I was like, "THAT'S MIGUEL'S JOKE!!!"
:D Not to down the quality of the book, but that is the most memorable thing about it to me.

russw
11-17-2010, 02:09 PM
I remember now... it was a girl in College that asked one time "Do you know what Kurt Cobain would be doing if he was alive right now?" I said no and then she did the scratching the air gag


EDIT - she was a cute as a button freshman and I haven't thought about her is years so thanks for the memory.

EDIT 2 - this event that recalling must have happened the year I knew this girl and that would put in 1991 and that was years before Cobain capped himself so she must have used some other recently dead celebrity for the joke.

ernster
11-17-2010, 03:05 PM
i'm pretty sure you can tell it at any funeral. i'm not sure whether you will be welcome afterward, however.

George Relish Pants
11-17-2010, 03:13 PM
Well there's 15 years down the drain.

capntightpants
11-17-2010, 03:17 PM
For 15 years, I've been looking for a reason to ask that question!

In fact, I was planning on bringing it up somehow when we saw each other next, but good luck now buddy! You should've kept this to yourself a little bit longer!

dougmac
11-17-2010, 03:21 PM
I know I have heard that joke before. either from someone I knew or from a movie/tv show. The image in my mind is of someone making scratching motions with the hands after the setup

Autin Powers does that motion when Liz Hurley asks him soemthing like "so that's you in a nutshell?" and he replies while pantomiming like he's trapped in a giant nutshell "help,help, I'm trapped in a giant nutshell"

Also, the Spiderman 2099 is what sprung to mind right away

GelfXIII
11-17-2010, 03:22 PM
You need some sort of gag so people know the joke is over and it's time to laugh. Try saying, "Waka waka!"

I'm in favor of the old classic 'rimshot' sound effect: BA Bump bump.

Thudpucker
11-17-2010, 05:26 PM
It would make me laugh. :thumb:

Kedd
11-17-2010, 05:34 PM
For 15 years, I've been looking for a reason to ask that question!

In fact, I was planning on bringing it up somehow when we saw each other next, but good luck now buddy! You should've kept this to yourself a little bit longer!

Dammit! Patience, Kedd! You must learn patience!!!!!! :nonono2:

Ryan Elliott
11-17-2010, 05:41 PM
Dammit! Patience, Kedd! You must learn patience!!!!!! :nonono2:

Was I any different when you taught me?


Wait...

Stark Raving
11-17-2010, 05:44 PM
Oh yeah? Well, the jerk store called...

Your Pal, Carl
11-17-2010, 05:48 PM
It's going to happen one day...i fully expect to get no laughs and I will gladly endure the disgusted looks of the other person.

Have you met Nick T?

IPeacock
11-17-2010, 05:58 PM
And I've been holding onto this joke for the better part of 15 years, just aching for a chance to use it. Every conversation of my life revolves around maneuvering the other person into setting up this joke for me. And every conversation of the past 15 years has refused to lead to the set up. i share with you now, the set up and the joke:

The Set up:
Do you know what my (father/mather/famous person/mentor) would say if he/she were alive right now?


The Joke:
"Help! Help! Get me out of this casket!" ?

I waited seven years for someone to ask me if I thought they were predictable so I could say "I knew you were going to say that."

It was worth the wait. Its like having a sarcasm orgasm.