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View Full Version : I just wrote my first letter to the editor.



NATE!
01-04-2008, 07:14 PM
To the Herald-Leader:


I usually get a good laugh out of watching people knock each other over in an attempt to be politically correct and leftist for appearance's sake, so naturally, the Herald-Leader's Editorial Page is a good place to get that in lieu of the internet. The January 4th issue proved hilarious as usual, and after reading Joseph Galloway's attempts to be relevant at the expense of the Bhutto assassination, I happened upon a letter from a man who lives in the same town as I do, and because of his residence there, I'm now considering moving. His letter began with:

"Kentuckians are among the most obese, uneducated, drug-addicted, and toothless people in America."

Reading through the rest of the letter, which after much pointless rambling makes allusions to things such as Boston being the shiny, happy promised land of all things tolerant and good, and Kentucky being in the 17th century, I came to realize that this person obviously didn't like Kentucky too much.

You know, I don't like Kentucky that much, myself, but even I'm not so much of an idealistic fool with rose-tinted glasses to believe that Boston is full of skinny, masters-degree holding tea-totalers with perfect teeth. Moreover, I don't know of any place in America that has that. Honestly, though, I can't be surprised at this letter, as it screams "hipster elitist" in every word, and reads like it came from a pamphlet handed out at a coffee shop where mind-numbingly bad poetry is read by people who wear Che Guevara t-shirts without the slightest sense of irony.

Getting back to the point, I reiterate that this person obviously doesn't like Kentucky. My advice for this person would be to leave. Kentucky won't miss someone who things about it's population that way, and the job he leaves, the apartment he vacates and the friends he abandons will all be enjoyed by someone else who actually wants to leave here. And then, he can actually head to Boston, where, as I said, he might find his promised land, but in reality will find that it's no better than anywhere else, as would any smiling idiot who wants to shove their homogenized version of peace, love and tolerance down your throat.

Too harsh?

Amos Moses
01-04-2008, 07:16 PM
Are you saying it got printed or you just sent it?

NATE!
01-04-2008, 07:16 PM
And yes, I noticed the errors. I'm tired. That's what editors are for. That and destroying marriages.

NATE!
01-04-2008, 07:17 PM
Are you saying it got printed or you just sent it?

Just sent it. Whether or not it gets printed is anyone's guess.

Sackhead
01-04-2008, 07:17 PM
Well, you did misspell "thinks" in the last paragraph. Otherwise, you did get your point across.

EDIT: Ok, you've acknowledged the errors.

Amos Moses
01-04-2008, 07:19 PM
Just sent it. Whether or not it gets printed is anyone's guess.

Ah cool. As for the letter, well, it's classic NATE! ;)

NATE!
01-04-2008, 07:20 PM
Ah cool. As for the letter, well, it's classic NATE! ;)

I like kicking it old school, yo.

Amos Moses
01-04-2008, 07:39 PM
I like kicking it old school, yo.

Love the new avatar and name by the way.

NATE!
01-04-2008, 07:40 PM
Love the new avatar and name by the way.

Demoman is awesomeness personified.

Ray G.
01-04-2008, 07:47 PM
:thumb:

I've been printed five times. My favorite was proposing a "nutjob of the week" award for the letters to the editor. None of them were as good as this, though. :D

Ryan F
01-04-2008, 07:56 PM
Well Kentucky is the seventh most obese state, but its only seventeenth lowest in average IQ, and down at nineteenth in meth use.

He's got you on the teeth though:
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/nationworld/sfl-flateeth1226sbdec26,0,1328308.story

NATE!
01-04-2008, 08:33 PM
Well Kentucky is the seventh most obese state, but its only seventeenth lowest in average IQ, and down at nineteenth in meth use.

He's got you on the teeth though:
http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/nationworld/sfl-flateeth1226sbdec26,0,1328308.story

Yeah. Damn those poor folks and their inability to get premium or even mediocre dental care.

WinterRose
01-05-2008, 02:16 AM
I destroyed a marriage by saving my sweetie from being trapped in Kentucky. Can I be an editor? I'll take Joe Q's job. I have more sense.

RebootedCorpse
01-05-2008, 06:04 AM
Too long.