View Full Version : Only the lonely...

07-05-2007, 06:50 AM

I saw a documentary about this on BBC-America, called Love Me, Love my Doll. I'm still having nightmares about it.

Well, Hello, Dolly
For some people, dating is a hassle and getting married just plain scary. Could the ultimate companion come shipped in a box?

I flew 11,000 km in economy class to play with a doll. As a child, I played with G.I. Joe and when Joe went on leave, he would occasionally hook up with my sister's Barbie, and they'd, you know—but it was just a stage and I went on to more typical boyish fun like shooting the windows out of the neighbor's garage and jumping my bike off ramps a la Evel Kneivel. But here I am at age 32, back playing with a dolly. My mother will not approve: this is not just any doll. Stacy is tall enough to look me in the eye and is kind of sexy. In fact, with three realistically rendered pleasure portals, she's all about sex.

Since 1996, Abyss Creations has shipped more than 800 of the jarringly lifelike sex dolls. Each week between six and eight beauties are tarted up in bra, panties and stockings and loaded into rough wooden crates for delivery from San Marcos, California, to their new owners. The dolls' creator, 32-year-old Matt McMullen, is disarmingly normal. Wearing a baseball cap and faded jeans, he looks more grunge rocker than sleaze merchant. His merchandise, on the other hand, is way out there. The five body types range from sleek nymphets to one whose upper deck would make Anna Nicole Smith insecure. "We've actually scaled back from making the biggest one," says McMullen. "It was a little out of control." Cupping the pendulous breasts, which feel like, uh, breasts, I have to agree. They transcend Dolly. They mock Pamela.

After I have picked the body of my personal sweetheart—sort of your average supermodel and unlike any female body I or anyone I know have ever experienced—it's time to pick a face. Nika looks kind of stuck-up and bitchy. Ditto for Celine. Also, she reportedly slept with U.S. radio shock jock Howard Stern and that's just gross. The Japanese doll, Mai, looks a bit too schoolgirlish with her pigtails. I decide on Stacy. Sure, with her 58-cm (23-in) waist, 95-cm (36-in) size C breasts and taut stomach, she's a babe. But don't hate her because she's beautiful. Since my mom is kind of conservative, the black mini-dress, size zero (women don't like women who wear size zero) would have to go before I took her home. But she has a gleam in her eye (albeit glass) that says: "Pick me, we'll party."

We decide to have our date near where she was born. It isn't the most romantic of spots. In fact, the industrial park outside San Diego is kind of a turnoff. In the middle of the 700-sq-m Realdoll factory, seven barrels cradle what can only be described as human-back half-molds. Abyss won't let us photograph certain parts of the process for fear that industrial secrets will be revealed (and because a visual reminder that your girlfriend has a frame inside that looks like a lawn chair could spoil the mood. Unless your tastes run to patio furniture, in which case you'd really love these dolls for their inner selves).

In the finishing area where makeup and nails are applied, a scene both horrible and erotic confronts my eyes: dangling from chains from the ceiling are seven headless, footless, handless dolls of varying shapes of female perfection. They sway back and forth, hypnotizing me—until I notice that seated behind me are five of their silicone sisters. Startled, I turn to look them in the eyes. Maureen Kelly, a 40-ish California blond with a rock 'n' roll outlook and a cat tattoo on her ankle, laughs at my discomfort. She does makeup and dresses the dolls. "See that one?" she says, pointing to a fairly haggard-looking specimen. "She did the Realdoll movie with porn star Ron Jeremy." Jeremy, built like a hairy, oversexed walrus, was apparently more than the poor thing could take.

This was not the road McMullen intended to travel. Growing up, he wanted to be an artist or a rock star. While still harboring the musician's dream, he started to work for a company making Halloween masks. A keen sculptor, he began to shape life-size figures out of silicone. "Most sculpture is like 500 pounds of rock. Once you get it, there isn't much you can do with it," he says, squinting through his constant companion cloud of cigarette smoke. "I wanted to make sculpture that could interact with people." And, as he discovered, people wanted to interact with his sculpture. When he posted photos of his work on his website, he was flooded with e-mails asking if it was possible to get a doll—for sex. At first, McMullen was taken aback. Then he was skeptical. But he quickly had 10 orders for the dolls, priced at $5,000 each and paid in advance. In his garage, he and his wife—whose hands and feet, but no other extremities, are models for the dolls—built their first anatomically correct girls. Curious, I ask him how he got the "feel" right. Without missing a beat, he looks me in the eye: "Trial and error, man."

The feedback on the website (www.realdoll.com) is rhapsodic. One consumer writes: "I just got my Realdoll this morning. I think I'm in love! THANK YOU! If my doll is any example then your site does NOT do your dolls justice. Leah's face is SO beautiful and her breasts are AMAZING! How do you do that?! I can't keep my hands off her! Leah and I had some wild fun this evening and I've got big plans for her this coming weekend."

Is this as troubling as it seems? What does getting jiggy with a mannequin say about where we are as a species? Humans have always practiced self-love, it's just that faking it has never looked this real. Except for the faint seams down their sides and fingers that bend in weird directions, the dolls are almost uncomfortably lifelike. Unlike many inflatable partners or love toys, Realdolls don't come with vibrators, ticklers or other enhancements. McMullen wanted them to be as natural as possible. When I ask why he didn't give them cellulite and a voice recording that says "I love only you" or, perhaps, "This is demeaning to women," he looks at me knowingly as someone who understands that realism has its limits.

As to the feminine critics—and there are a few who are cranky about the paucity of Realguys—Abyss will soon be able to answer with a male doll. A strapping Conan: the Barbarian kind of guy with a friggin' enormous personality. At least judging from the model so far: it's still in clay form, where all of the dolls begin life.

Like any technology, the dolls are constantly changing. The feel of silicone has improved and sensors are being added to the doll's naughty bits so it can tell when it is being touched. Via an Ethernet port in the neck, you can trigger audio samplings like "Oooooh, baby." McMullen walks over to another doll and flips a switch. An electric motor purrs and the doll begins to grind its hips with enough thrust to silence even Captain Kirk's constant demands for more.

So what's next? Well, traipsing seductively across the bedroom is a long way off. Current walking robots are more lurching Frankenstein monsters than slinking femme fatales. "Muscle is currently impossible to mimic," says Ronald Fearing, electrical engineering and robotics professor at Berkeley who is working on an automated fly. "Giving it artificial intelligence isn't much of a problem, but giving it human grace is a long way off." So while Stacy may be a real doll, you'll never mistake her for a real woman.

Jim T.
07-05-2007, 06:58 AM
Stern had a Real Doll in the studio for years. I think some or all of the guys on the show engaged in acts with her.

07-05-2007, 07:17 AM
Stern had a Real Doll in the studio for years. I think some or all of the guys on the show engaged in acts with her.

:scared: :scared: :scared:

07-05-2007, 07:19 AM
Stern had a Real Doll in the studio for years. I think some or all of the guys on the show engaged in acts with her.

Stern gave this guy a ton of publicity when he was first starting out, and that doll was around for a long time in the studio.

07-05-2007, 07:22 AM
Stern had a Real Doll in the studio for years. I think some or all of the guys on the show engaged in acts with her.

I think it was all of the guys...and this dude had a profile done on him for Real Sex

Jim T.
07-05-2007, 07:25 AM
:scared: :scared: :scared:

:D Guests were frequently freaked out by her presence.

07-05-2007, 07:30 AM
I'm freaked out about the guys profiled in the documentary. Some were sad cases (like the guy in the UK), but the guy from Virginia, who also owned many weapons, scared the crap out of me.

07-05-2007, 07:35 AM
I haven't heard about a Real Doll in years... I think I saw them in an issue of Spin or something. Other than being a running gag among my friends for awhile, that was the only place I'd ever seen 'em. Their website was hilarious... The "girls" had personality profiles and shit, and if you couldn't afford thousands of dollars on a doll, they'd just sell you a functional pelvis area. :lol: In a way, much creepier, since it had the bottom of the belly and tops of the thighs... like a horror movie prop.